Chapter II.
Chapter III.
Chapter IV.
Chapter V.
Chapter VI.
Chapter VII.
Chapter VIII.
Chapter IX.
Chapter X.
Chapter XI.
Chapter XII.

THE PUBLISHER TO THE READER.

The author of these Travels, Mr. Lemuel
Gulliver, is my ancient and intimate friend;
there is likewise some relation between us
on the mother’s side. About three years
ago, Mr. Gulliver growing weary of the
concourse of curious people coming to him
at his house in Redriff, made a small
purchase of land, with a convenient house,
near Newark, in Nottinghamshire, his native
country; where he now lives retired, yet in
good esteem among his neighbours.

Although Mr. Gulliver was born in
Nottinghamshire, where his father dwelt,
yet I have heard him say his family came
from Oxfordshire; to confirm which, I have
observed in the churchyard at Banbury in
that county, several tombs and monuments
of the Gullivers.

Before he quitted Redriff, he left the

-1-

RICHARD SYMPSON.

A LETTER FROM CAPTAIN GULLIVER
TO HIS COUSIN SYMPSON.

WRITTEN IN THE YEAR 1727.

I hope you will be ready to own publicly,
whenever you shall be called to it, that by
your great and frequent urgency you
prevailed on me to publish a very loose and
uncorrect account of my travels, with
directions to hire some young gentleman of
either university to put them in order, and
correct the style, as my cousin Dampier did,
by my advice, in his book called “A Voyage
round the world.” But I do not remember I
gave you power to consent that any thing
should be omitted, and much less that any
thing should be inserted; therefore, as to the
latter, I do here renounce every thing of that
kind; particularly a paragraph about her
majesty Queen Anne, of most pious and
glorious memory; although I did reverence
and esteem her more than any of human
species. But you, or your interpolator, ought
to have considered, that it was not my
inclination, so was it not decent to praise
any animal of our composition before my
master Houyhnhnm: And besides, the fact
was altogether false; for to my knowledge,
being in England during some part of her
majesty’s reign, she did govern by a chief
minister; nay even by two successively, the
first whereof was the lord of Godolphin, and
the second the lord of Oxford; so that you
have made me say the thing that was not.
Likewise in the account of the academy of
projectors, and several passages of my
discourse to my master Houyhnhnm, you
have either omitted some material
circumstances, or minced or changed them
in such a manner, that I do hardly know my
own work. When I formerly hinted to you
something of this in a letter, you were
pleased to answer that you were afraid of

-2-

education entirely changed; the physicians
banished; the female Yahoos abounding in
virtue, honour, truth, and good sense; courts
and levees of great ministers thoroughly
weeded and swept; wit, merit, and learning
rewarded; all disgracers of the press in
prose and verse condemned to eat nothing
but their own cotton, and quench their thirst
with their own ink. These, and a thousand
other reformations, I firmly counted upon by
your encouragement; as indeed they were
plainly deducible from the precepts
delivered in my book. And it must be
owned, that seven months were a sufficient
time to correct every vice and folly to which
Yahoos are subject, if their natures had
been capable of the least disposition to
virtue or wisdom. Yet, so far have you been
from answering my expectation in any of
your letters; that on the contrary you are
loading our carrier every week with libels,
and keys, and reflections, and memoirs,
and second parts; wherein I see myself
accused of reflecting upon great state folk;
of degrading human nature (for so they have
still the confidence to style it), and of
abusing the female sex. I find likewise that
the writers of those bundles are not agreed
among themselves; for some of them will
not allow me to be the author of my own
travels; and others make me author of
books to which I am wholly a stranger.

I find likewise that your printer has been so
careless as to confound the times, and
mistake the dates, of my several voyages
and returns; neither assigning the true year,
nor the true month, nor day of the month: and
I hear the original manuscript is all
destroyed since the publication of my book;
neither have I any copy left: however, I have
sent you some corrections, which you may
insert, if ever there should be a second
edition: and yet I cannot stand to them; but
shall leave that matter to my judicious and
candid readers to adjust it as they please.

-3-

Houyhnhnms I keep in my stable; because
from these, degenerate as they are, I still
improve in some virtues without any mixture
of vice.

Do these miserable animals presume to
think, that I am so degenerated as to defend
my veracity? Yahoo as I am, it is well known
through all Houyhnhnmland, that, by the
instructions and example of my illustrious
master, I was able in the compass of two
years (although I confess with the utmost
difficulty) to remove that infernal habit of
lying, shuffling, deceiving, and
equivocating, so deeply rooted in the very
souls of all my species; especially the
Europeans.

I have other complaints to make upon this
vexatious occasion; but I forbear troubling
myself or you any further. I must freely
confess, that since my last return, some
corruptions of my Yahoo nature have
revived in me by conversing with a few of
your species, and particularly those of my
own family, by an unavoidable necessity;
else I should never have attempted so
absurd a project as that of reforming the
Yahoo race in this kingdom: But I have now
done with all such visionary schemes for
ever.

April 2, 1727

PART I. A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT.

CHAPTER I.

[The author gives some account of himself
and family. His first inducements to travel.
He is shipwrecked, and swims for his life.
Gets safe on shore in the country of Lilliput;
is made a prisoner, and carried up the
country.]

My father had a small estate in

-4-

practice of too many among my brethren.
Having therefore consulted with my wife,
and some of my acquaintance, I determined
to go again to sea. I was surgeon
successively in two ships, and made
several voyages, for six years, to the East
and West Indies, by which I got some
addition to my fortune. My hours of leisure I
spent in reading the best authors, ancient
and modern, being always provided with a
good number of books; and when I was
ashore, in observing the manners and
dispositions of the people, as well as
learning their language; wherein I had a
great facility, by the strength of my memory.

The last of these voyages not proving very
fortunate, I grew weary of the sea, and
intended to stay at home with my wife and
family. I removed from the Old Jewry to
Fetter Lane, and from thence to Wapping,
hoping to get business among the sailors;
but it would not turn to account. After three
years expectation that things would mend, I
accepted an advantageous offer from
Captain William Prichard, master of the
Antelope, who was making a voyage to the
South Sea. We set sail from Bristol, May 4,
1699, and our voyage was at first very
prosperous.

It would not be proper, for some reasons, to
trouble the reader with the particulars of our
adventures in those seas; let it suffice to
inform him, that in our passage from thence
to the East Indies, we were driven by a
violent storm to the north-west of Van
Diemen’s Land. By an observation, we
found ourselves in the latitude of 30 degrees
2 minutes south. Twelve of our crew were
dead by immoderate labour and ill food; the
rest were in a very weak condition. On the
5th of November, which was the beginning
of summer in those parts, the weather being
very hazy, the seamen spied a rock within
half a cable’s length of the ship; but the wind

-5-

began to grow hot, and the light offended
my eyes. I heard a confused noise about
me; but in the posture I lay, could see
nothing except the sky. In a little time I felt
something alive moving on my left leg,
which advancing gently forward over my
breast, came almost up to my chin; when,
bending my eyes downwards as much as I
could, I perceived it to be a human creature
not six inches high, with a bow and arrow in
his hands, and a quiver at his back. In the
mean time, I felt at least forty more of the
same kind (as I conjectured) following the
first. I was in the utmost astonishment, and
roared so loud, that they all ran back in a
fright; and some of them, as I was
afterwards told, were hurt with the falls they
got by leaping from my sides upon the
ground. However, they soon returned, and
one of them, who ventured so far as to get a
full sight of my face, lifting up his hands and
eyes by way of admiration, cried out in a
shrill but distinct voice, Hekinah degul: the
others repeated the same words several
times, but then I knew not what they meant. I
lay all this while, as the reader may believe,
in great uneasiness. At length, struggling to
get loose, I had the fortune to break the
strings, and wrench out the pegs that
fastened my left arm to the ground; for, by
lifting it up to my face, I discovered the
methods they had taken to bind me, and at
the same time with a violent pull, which gave
me excessive pain, I a little loosened the
strings that tied down my hair on the left
side, so that I was just able to turn my head
about two inches. But the creatures ran off a
second time, before I could seize them;
whereupon there was a great shout in a very
shrill accent, and after it ceased I heard one
of them cry aloud Tolgo phonac; when in an
instant I felt above a hundred arrows
discharged on my left hand, which, pricked
me like so many needles; and besides, they
shot another flight into the air, as we do
bombs in Europe, whereof many, I

-6-

was a page that held up his train, and
seemed to be somewhat longer than my
middle finger; the other two stood one on
each side to support him. He acted every
part of an orator, and I could observe many
periods of threatenings, and others of
promises, pity, and kindness. I answered in
a few words, but in the most submissive
manner, lifting up my left hand, and both my
eyes to the sun, as calling him for a witness;
and being almost famished with hunger,
having not eaten a morsel for some hours
before I left the ship, I found the demands of
nature so strong upon me, that I could not
forbear showing my impatience (perhaps
against the strict rules of decency) by
putting my finger frequently to my mouth, to
signify that I wanted food. The hurgo (for so
they call a great lord, as I afterwards learnt)
understood me very well. He descended
from the stage, and commanded that
several ladders should be applied to my
sides, on which above a hundred of the
inhabitants mounted and walked towards
my mouth, laden with baskets full of meat,
which had been provided and sent thither by
the king’s orders, upon the first intelligence
he received of me. I observed there was the
flesh of several animals, but could not
distinguish them by the taste. There were
shoulders, legs, and loins, shaped like
those of mutton, and very well dressed, but
smaller than the wings of a lark. I ate them
by two or three at a mouthful, and took three
loaves at a time, about the bigness of
musket bullets. They supplied me as fast as
they could, showing a thousand marks of
wonder and astonishment at my bulk and
appetite. I then made another sign, that I
wanted drink. They found by my eating that
a small quantity would not suffice me; and
being a most ingenious people, they slung
up, with great dexterity, one of their largest
hogsheads, then rolled it towards my hand,
and beat out the top; I drank it off at a
draught, which I might well do, for it did not

-7-

forwards, which, as I afterwards found,
was towards the capital city, about half a
mile distant; whither it was agreed by his
majesty in council that I must be conveyed. I
answered in few words, but to no purpose,
and made a sign with my hand that was
loose, putting it to the other (but over his
excellency’s head for fear of hurting him or
his train) and then to my own head and
body, to signify that I desired my liberty. It
appeared that he understood me well
enough, for he shook his head by way of
disapprobation, and held his hand in a
posture to show that I must be carried as a
prisoner. However, he made other signs to
let me understand that I should have meat
and drink enough, and very good treatment.
Whereupon I once more thought of
attempting to break my bonds; but again,
when I felt the smart of their arrows upon my
face and hands, which were all in blisters,
and many of the darts still sticking in them,
and observing likewise that the number of
my enemies increased, I gave tokens to let
them know that they might do with me what
they pleased. Upon this, the hurgo and his
train withdrew, with much civility and
cheerful countenances. Soon after I heard a
general shout, with frequent repetitions of
the words Peplom selan; and I felt great
numbers of people on my left side relaxing
the cords to such a degree, that I was able
to turn upon my right, and to ease myself
with making water; which I very plentifully
did, to the great astonishment of the
people; who, conjecturing by my motion
what I was going to do, immediately
opened to the right and left on that side, to
avoid the torrent, which fell with such noise
and violence from me. But before this, they
had daubed my face and both my hands
with a sort of ointment, very pleasant to the
smell, which, in a few minutes, removed all
the smart of their arrows. These
circumstances, added to the refreshment I
had received by their victuals and drink,

-8-

engineers were immediately set at work to
prepare the greatest engine they had. It was
a frame of wood raised three inches from
the ground, about seven feet long, and four
wide, moving upon twenty-two wheels. The
shout I heard was upon the arrival of this
engine, which, it seems, set out in four
hours after my landing. It was brought
parallel to me, as I lay. But the principal
difficulty was to raise and place me in this
vehicle. Eighty poles, each of one foot high,
were erected for this purpose, and very
strong cords, of the bigness of packthread,
were fastened by hooks to many bandages,
which the workmen had girt round my neck,
my hands, my body, and my legs. Nine
hundred of the strongest men were
employed to draw up these cords, by many
pulleys fastened on the poles; and thus, in
less than three hours, I was raised and slung
into the engine, and there tied fast. All this I
was told; for, while the operation was
performing, I lay in a profound sleep, by the
force of that soporiferous medicine infused
into my liquor. Fifteen hundred of the
emperor’s largest horses, each about four
inches and a half high, were employed to
draw me towards the metropolis, which, as
I said, was half a mile distant.

About four hours after we began our
journey, I awaked by a very ridiculous
accident; for the carriage being stopped a
while, to adjust something that was out of
order, two or three of the young natives had
the curiosity to see how I looked when I was
asleep; they climbed up into the engine, and
advancing very softly to my face, one of
them, an officer in the guards, put the sharp
end of his half-pike a good way up into my
left nostril, which tickled my nose like a
straw, and made me sneeze violently;
whereupon they stole off unperceived, and
it was three weeks before I knew the cause
of my waking so suddenly. We made a long
march the remaining part of the day, and,

-9-

found it was impossible for me to break
loose, they cut all the strings that bound me;
whereupon I rose up, with as melancholy a
disposition as ever I had in my life. But the
noise and astonishment of the people, at
seeing me rise and walk, are not to be
expressed. The chains that held my left leg
were about two yards long, and gave me
not only the liberty of walking backwards
and forwards in a semicircle, but, being
fixed within four inches of the gate, allowed
me to creep in, and lie at my full length in the
temple.

CHAPTER II.

[The emperor of Lilliput, attended by
several of the nobility, comes to see the
author in his confinement. The emperor’s
person and habit described. Learned men
appointed to teach the author their
language. He gains favour by his mild
disposition. His pockets are searched, and
his sword and pistols taken from him.]

When I found myself on my feet, I looked
about me, and must confess I never beheld
a more entertaining prospect. The country
around appeared like a continued garden,
and the enclosed fields, which were
generally forty feet square, resembled so
many beds of flowers. These fields were
intermingled with woods of half a stang, {1}
and the tallest trees, as I could judge,
appeared to be seven feet high. I viewed
the town on my left hand, which looked like
the painted scene of a city in a theatre.

I had been for some hours extremely
pressed by the necessities of nature; which
was no wonder, it being almost two days
since I had last disburdened myself. I was
under great difficulties between urgency
and shame. The best expedient I could think
of, was to creep into my house, which I
accordingly did; and shutting the gate after

-10-

afforded me two or three good mouthfuls;
and I emptied the liquor of ten vessels,
which was contained in earthen vials, into
one vehicle, drinking it off at a draught; and
so I did with the rest. The empress, and
young princes of the blood of both sexes,
attended by many ladies, sat at some
distance in their chairs; but upon the
accident that happened to the emperor’s
horse, they alighted, and came near his
person, which I am now going to describe.
He is taller by almost the breadth of my nail,
than any of his court; which alone is enough
to strike an awe into the beholders. His
features are strong and masculine, with an
Austrian lip and arched nose, his
complexion olive, his countenance erect,
his body and limbs well proportioned, all his
motions graceful, and his deportment
majestic. He was then past his prime,
being twenty-eight years and three quarters
old, of which he had reigned about seven in
great felicity, and generally victorious. For
the better convenience of beholding him, I
lay on my side, so that my face was parallel
to his, and he stood but three yards off:
however, I have had him since many times
in my hand, and therefore cannot be
deceived in the description. His dress was
very plain and simple, and the fashion of it
between the Asiatic and the European; but
he had on his head a light helmet of gold,
adorned with jewels, and a plume on the
crest. He held his sword drawn in his hand
to defend himself, if I should happen to
break loose; it was almost three inches
long; the hilt and scabbard were gold
enriched with diamonds. His voice was
shrill, but very clear and articulate; and I
could distinctly hear it when I stood up. The
ladies and courtiers were all most
magnificently clad; so that the spot they
stood upon seemed to resemble a petticoat
spread upon the ground, embroidered with
figures of gold and silver. His imperial
majesty spoke often to me, and I returned

-11-

beds of the common measure were brought
in carriages, and worked up in my house; a
hundred and fifty of their beds, sewn
together, made up the breadth and length;
and these were four double: which,
however, kept me but very indifferently from
the hardness of the floor, that was of
smooth stone. By the same computation,
they provided me with sheets, blankets, and
coverlets, tolerable enough for one who had
been so long inured to hardships.

As the news of my arrival spread through
the kingdom, it brought prodigious numbers
of rich, idle, and curious people to see me;
so that the villages were almost emptied;
and great neglect of tillage and household
affairs must have ensued, if his imperial
majesty had not provided, by several
proclamations and orders of state, against
this inconveniency. He directed that those
who had already beheld me should return
home, and not presume to come within fifty
yards of my house, without license from the
court; whereby the secretaries of state got
considerable fees.

In the mean time the emperor held frequent
councils, to debate what course should be
taken with me; and I was afterwards
assured by a particular friend, a person of
great quality, who was as much in the secret
as any, that the court was under many
difficulties concerning me. They
apprehended my breaking loose; that my
diet would be very expensive, and might
cause a famine. Sometimes they
determined to starve me; or at least to shoot
me in the face and hands with poisoned
arrows, which would soon despatch me;
but again they considered, that the stench of
so large a carcass might produce a plague
in the metropolis, and probably spread
through the whole kingdom. In the midst of
these consultations, several officers of the
army went to the door of the great council-

-12-

pesso desmar lon emposo;” that is, swear
a peace with him and his kingdom.
However, that I should be used with all
kindness. And he advised me to “acquire,
by my patience and discreet behaviour, the
good opinion of himself and his subjects.”
He desired “I would not take it ill, if he gave
orders to certain proper officers to search
me; for probably I might carry about me
several weapons, which must needs be
dangerous things, if they answered the bulk
of so prodigious a person.” I said, “His
majesty should be satisfied; for I was ready
to strip myself, and turn up my pockets
before him.” This I delivered part in words,
and part in signs. He replied, “that, by the
laws of the kingdom, I must be searched by
two of his officers; that he knew this could
not be done without my consent and
assistance; and he had so good an opinion
of my generosity and justice, as to trust their
persons in my hands; that whatever they
took from me, should be returned when I left
the country, or paid for at the rate which I
would set upon them.” I took up the two
officers in my hands, put them first into my
coat-pockets, and then into every other
pocket about me, except my two fobs, and
another secret pocket, which I had no mind
should be searched, wherein I had some
little necessaries that were of no
consequence to any but myself. In one of my
fobs there was a silver watch, and in the
other a small quantity of gold in a purse.
These gentlemen, having pen, ink, and
paper, about them, made an exact inventory
of every thing they saw; and when they had
done, desired I would set them down, that
they might deliver it to the emperor. This
inventory I afterwards translated into
English, and is, word for word, as follows:

“Imprimis: In the right coat-pocket of the
great man-mountain” (for so I interpret the
words quinbus flestrin,) “after the strictest
search, we found only one great piece of

-13-

of the other there appeared a white round
substance, about twice the bigness of our
heads. Within each of these was enclosed a
prodigious plate of steel; which, by our
orders, we obliged him to show us,
because we apprehended they might be
dangerous engines. He took them out of
their cases, and told us, that in his own
country his practice was to shave his beard
with one of these, and cut his meat with the
other. There were two pockets which we
could not enter: these he called his fobs;
they were two large slits cut into the top of
his middle cover, but squeezed close by the
pressure of his belly. Out of the right fob
hung a great silver chain, with a wonderful
kind of engine at the bottom. We directed
him to draw out whatever was at the end of
that chain; which appeared to be a globe,
half silver, and half of some transparent
metal; for, on the transparent side, we saw
certain strange figures circularly drawn, and
thought we could touch them, till we found
our fingers stopped by the lucid substance.
He put this engine into our ears, which
made an incessant noise, like that of a
water-mill: and we conjecture it is either
some unknown animal, or the god that he
worships; but we are more inclined to the
latter opinion, because he assured us, (if
we understood him right, for he expressed
himself very imperfectly) that he seldom did
any thing without consulting it. He called it
his oracle, and said, it pointed out the time
for every action of his life. From the left fob
he took out a net almost large enough for a
fisherman, but contrived to open and shut
like a purse, and served him for the same
use: we found therein several massy pieces
of yellow metal, which, if they be real gold,
must be of immense value.

“Having thus, in obedience to your
majesty’s commands, diligently searched
all his pockets, we observed a girdle about
his waist made of the hide of some

-14-

demanded was one of the hollow iron
pillars; by which he meant my pocket
pistols. I drew it out, and at his desire, as
well as I could, expressed to him the use of
it; and charging it only with powder, which,
by the closeness of my pouch, happened to
escape wetting in the sea (an
inconvenience against which all prudent
mariners take special care to provide,) I first
cautioned the emperor not to be afraid, and
then I let it off in the air. The astonishment
here was much greater than at the sight of
my scimitar. Hundreds fell down as if they
had been struck dead; and even the
emperor, although he stood his ground,
could not recover himself for some time. I
delivered up both my pistols in the same
manner as I had done my scimitar, and then
my pouch of powder and bullets; begging
him that the former might be kept from fire,
for it would kindle with the smallest spark,
and blow up his imperial palace into the air. I
likewise delivered up my watch, which the
emperor was very curious to see, and
commanded two of his tallest yeomen of the
guards to bear it on a pole upon their
shoulders, as draymen in England do a
barrel of ale. He was amazed at the
continual noise it made, and the motion of
the minute-hand, which he could easily
discern; for their sight is much more acute
than ours: he asked the opinions of his
learned men about it, which were various
and remote, as the reader may well imagine
without my repeating; although indeed I
could not very perfectly understand them. I
then gave up my silver and copper money,
my purse, with nine large pieces of gold,
and some smaller ones; my knife and razor,
my comb and silver snuff-box, my
handkerchief and journal-book. My
scimitar, pistols, and pouch, were
conveyed in carriages to his majesty’s
stores; but the rest of my goods were
returned me.

-15-

This diversion is only practised by those
persons who are candidates for great
employments, and high favour at court. They
are trained in this art from their youth, and
are not always of noble birth, or liberal
education. When a great office is vacant,
either by death or disgrace (which often
happens,) five or six of those candidates
petition the emperor to entertain his
majesty and the court with a dance on the
rope; and whoever jumps the highest,
without falling, succeeds in the office. Very
often the chief ministers themselves are
commanded to show their skill, and to
convince the emperor that they have not lost
their faculty. Flimnap, the treasurer, is
allowed to cut a caper on the straight rope,
at least an inch higher than any other lord in
the whole empire. I have seen him do the
summerset several times together, upon a
trencher fixed on a rope which is no thicker
than a common packthread in England. My
friend Reldresal, principal secretary for
private affairs, is, in my opinion, if I am not
partial, the second after the treasurer; the
rest of the great officers are much upon a
par.

These diversions are often attended with
fatal accidents, whereof great numbers are
on record. I myself have seen two or three
candidates break a limb. But the danger is
much greater, when the ministers
themselves are commanded to show their
dexterity; for, by contending to excel
themselves and their fellows, they strain so
far that there is hardly one of them who has
not received a fall, and some of them two or
three. I was assured that, a year or two
before my arrival, Flimnap would infallibly
have broke his neck, if one of the king’s
cushions, that accidentally lay on the
ground, had not weakened the force of his
fall.

There is likewise another diversion, which

-16-

the thickness of an ordinary cane, to be
brought me; whereupon his majesty
commanded the master of his woods to
give directions accordingly; and the next
morning six woodmen arrived with as many
carriages, drawn by eight horses to each. I
took nine of these sticks, and fixing them
firmly in the ground in a quadrangular figure,
two feet and a half square, I took four other
sticks, and tied them parallel at each
corner, about two feet from the ground; then
I fastened my handkerchief to the nine
sticks that stood erect; and extended it on
all sides, till it was tight as the top of a drum;
and the four parallel sticks, rising about five
inches higher than the handkerchief, served
as ledges on each side. When I had finished
my work, I desired the emperor to let a troop
of his best horses twenty-four in number,
come and exercise upon this plain. His
majesty approved of the proposal, and I
took them up, one by one, in my hands,
ready mounted and armed, with the proper
officers to exercise them. As soon as they
got into order they divided into two parties,
performed mock skirmishes, discharged
blunt arrows, drew their swords, fled and
pursued, attacked and retired, and in short
discovered the best military discipline I ever
beheld. The parallel sticks secured them
and their horses from falling over the stage;
and the emperor was so much delighted,
that he ordered this entertainment to be
repeated several days, and once was
pleased to be lifted up and give the word of
command; and with great difficulty
persuaded even the empress herself to let
me hold her in her close chair within two
yards of the stage, when she was able to
take a full view of the whole performance. It
was my good fortune, that no ill accident
happened in these entertainments; only
once a fiery horse, that belonged to one of
the captains, pawing with his hoof, struck a
hole in my handkerchief, and his foot
slipping, he overthrew his rider and himself;

-17-

and the nature of it: and the next day the
waggoners arrived with it, but not in a very
good condition; they had bored two holes in
the brim, within an inch and half of the edge,
and fastened two hooks in the holes; these
hooks were tied by a long cord to the
harness, and thus my hat was dragged
along for above half an English mile; but,
the ground in that country being extremely
smooth and level, it received less damage
than I expected.

Two days after this adventure, the emperor,
having ordered that part of his army which
quarters in and about his metropolis, to be
in readiness, took a fancy of diverting
himself in a very singular manner. He
desired I would stand like a Colossus, with
my legs as far asunder as I conveniently
could. He then commanded his general
(who was an old experienced leader, and a
great patron of mine) to draw up the troops
in close order, and march them under me;
the foot by twenty-four abreast, and the
horse by sixteen, with drums beating,
colours flying, and pikes advanced. This
body consisted of three thousand foot, and
a thousand horse. His majesty gave orders,
upon pain of death, that every soldier in his
march should observe the strictest decency
with regard to my person; which however
could not prevent some of the younger
officers from turning up their eyes as they
passed under me: and, to confess the truth,
my breeches were at that time in so ill a
condition, that they afforded some
opportunities for laughter and admiration.

I had sent so many memorials and petitions
for my liberty, that his majesty at length
mentioned the matter, first in the cabinet,
and then in a full council; where it was
opposed by none, except Skyresh
Bolgolam, who was pleased, without any
provocation, to be my mortal enemy. But it
was carried against him by the whole

-18-

a solemn oath, he shall be obliged to
perform:

“1st, The man-mountain shall not depart
from our dominions, without our license
under our great seal.

“2d, He shall not presume to come into our
metropolis, without our express order; at
which time, the inhabitants shall have two
hours warning to keep within doors.

“3d, The said man-mountain shall confine
his walks to our principal high roads, and
not offer to walk, or lie down, in a meadow
or field of corn.

“4th, As he walks the said roads, he shall
take the utmost care not to trample upon the
bodies of any of our loving subjects, their
horses, or carriages, nor take any of our
subjects into his hands without their own
consent.

“5th, If an express requires extraordinary
despatch, the man-mountain shall be
obliged to carry, in his pocket, the
messenger and horse a six days journey,
once in every moon, and return the said
messenger back (if so required) safe to our
imperial presence.

“6th, He shall be our ally against our enemies
in the island of Blefuscu, and do his utmost
to destroy their fleet, which is now
preparing to invade us.

“7th, That the said man-mountain shall, at
his times of leisure, be aiding and assisting
to our workmen, in helping to raise certain
great stones, towards covering the wall of
the principal park, and other our royal
buildings.

“8th, That the said man-mountain shall, in
two moons’ time, deliver in an exact survey

-19-

bodies, that mine must contain at least 1724
of theirs, and consequently would require
as much food as was necessary to support
that number of Lilliputians. By which the
reader may conceive an idea of the
ingenuity of that people, as well as the
prudent and exact economy of so great a
prince.

CHAPTER IV.

[Mildendo, the metropolis of Lilliput,
described, together with the emperor’s
palace. A conversation between the author
and a principal secretary, concerning the
affairs of that empire. The author’s offers to
serve the emperor in his wars.]

The first request I made, after I had
obtained my liberty, was, that I might have
license to see Mildendo, the metropolis;
which the emperor easily granted me, but
with a special charge to do no hurt either to
the inhabitants or their houses. The people
had notice, by proclamation, of my design
to visit the town. The wall which
encompassed it is two feet and a half high,
and at least eleven inches broad, so that a
coach and horses may be driven very safely
round it; and it is flanked with strong towers
at ten feet distance. I stepped over the great
western gate, and passed very gently, and
sidling, through the two principal streets,
only in my short waistcoat, for fear of
damaging the roofs and eaves of the
houses with the skirts of my coat. I walked
with the utmost circumspection, to avoid
treading on any stragglers who might
remain in the streets, although the orders
were very strict, that all people should keep
in their houses, at their own peril. The garret
windows and tops of houses were so
crowded with spectators, that I thought in all
my travels I had not seen a more populous
place. The city is an exact square, each
side of the wall being five hundred feet long.

-20-

was eight feet wide. I then stept over the
building very conveniently from one stool to
the other, and drew up the first after me with
a hooked stick. By this contrivance I got into
the inmost court; and, lying down upon my
side, I applied my face to the windows of
the middle stories, which were left open on
purpose, and discovered the most splendid
apartments that can be imagined. There I
saw the empress and the young princes, in
their several lodgings, with their chief
attendants about them. Her imperial
majesty was pleased to smile very
graciously upon me, and gave me out of the
window her hand to kiss.

But I shall not anticipate the reader with
further descriptions of this kind, because I
reserve them for a greater work, which is
now almost ready for the press; containing
a general description of this empire, from
its first erection, through along series of
princes; with a particular account of their
wars and politics, laws, learning, and
religion; their plants and animals; their
peculiar manners and customs, with other
matters very curious and useful; my chief
design at present being only to relate such
events and transactions as happened to the
public or to myself during a residence of
about nine months in that empire.

One morning, about a fortnight after I had
obtained my liberty, Reldresal, principal
secretary (as they style him) for private
affairs, came to my house attended only by
one servant. He ordered his coach to wait at
a distance, and desired I would give him an
hours audience; which I readily consented
to, on account of his quality and personal
merits, as well as of the many good offices
he had done me during my solicitations at
court. I offered to lie down that he might the
more conveniently reach my ear, but he
chose rather to let me hold him in my hand
during our conversation. He began with

-21-

yourself, our philosophers are in much
doubt, and would rather conjecture that you
dropped from the moon, or one of the stars;
because it is certain, that a hundred mortals
of your bulk would in a short time destroy all
the fruits and cattle of his majesty’s
dominions: besides, our histories of six
thousand moons make no mention of any
other regions than the two great empires of
Lilliput and Blefuscu. Which two mighty
powers have, as I was going to tell you,
been engaged in a most obstinate war for
six-and-thirty moons past. It began upon
the following occasion. It is allowed on all
hands, that the primitive way of breaking
eggs, before we eat them, was upon the
larger end; but his present majesty’s
grandfather, while he was a boy, going to
eat an egg, and breaking it according to the
ancient practice, happened to cut one of his
fingers. Whereupon the emperor his father
published an edict, commanding all his
subjects, upon great penalties, to break the
smaller end of their eggs. The people so
highly resented this law, that our histories
tell us, there have been six rebellions raised
on that account; wherein one emperor lost
his life, and another his crown. These civil
commotions were constantly fomented by
the monarchs of Blefuscu; and when they
were quelled, the exiles always fled for
refuge to that empire. It is computed that
eleven thousand persons have at several
times suffered death, rather than submit to
break their eggs at the smaller end. Many
hundred large volumes have been
published upon this controversy: but the
books of the Big-endians have been long
forbidden, and the whole party rendered
incapable by law of holding employments.
During the course of these troubles, the
emperors of Blefusca did frequently
expostulate by their ambassadors,
accusing us of making a schism in religion,
by offending against a fundamental
doctrine of our great prophet Lustrog, in the

-22-

The empire of Blefuscu is an island situated
to the north-east of Lilliput, from which it is
parted only by a channel of eight hundred
yards wide. I had not yet seen it, and upon
this notice of an intended invasion, I
avoided appearing on that side of the
coast, for fear of being discovered, by
some of the enemy’s ships, who had
received no intelligence of me; all
intercourse between the two empires
having been strictly forbidden during the
war, upon pain of death, and an embargo
laid by our emperor upon all vessels
whatsoever. I communicated to his majesty
a project I had formed of seizing the
enemy’s whole fleet; which, as our scouts
assured us, lay at anchor in the harbour,
ready to sail with the first fair wind. I
consulted the most experienced seamen
upon the depth of the channel, which they
had often plumbed; who told me, that in the
middle, at high-water, it was seventy
glumgluffs deep, which is about six feet of
European measure; and the rest of it fifty
glumgluffs at most. I walked towards the
north-east coast, over against Blefuscu,
where, lying down behind a hillock, I took
out my small perspective glass, and viewed
the enemy’s fleet at anchor, consisting of
about fifty men of war, and a great number
of transports: I then came back to my house,
and gave orders (for which I had a warrant)
for a great quantity of the strongest cable
and bars of iron. The cable was about as
thick as packthread and the bars of the
length and size of a knitting-needle. I
trebled the cable to make it stronger, and
for the same reason I twisted three of the
iron bars together, bending the extremities
into a hook. Having thus fixed fifty hooks to
as many cables, I went back to the north-
east coast, and putting off my coat, shoes,
and stockings, walked into the sea, in my
leathern jerkin, about half an hour before
high water. I waded with what haste I could,
and swam in the middle about thirty yards,

-23-

perceived the whole fleet moving in order,
and saw me pulling at the end, they set up
such a scream of grief and despair as it is
almost impossible to describe or conceive.
When I had got out of danger, I stopped
awhile to pick out the arrows that stuck in my
hands and face; and rubbed on some of the
same ointment that was given me at my first
arrival, as I have formerly mentioned. I then
took off my spectacles, and waiting about
an hour, till the tide was a little fallen, I
waded through the middle with my cargo,
and arrived safe at the royal port of Lilliput.

The emperor and his whole court stood on
the shore, expecting the issue of this great
adventure. They saw the ships move
forward in a large half-moon, but could not
discern me, who was up to my breast in
water. When I advanced to the middle of the
channel, they were yet more in pain,
because I was under water to my neck. The
emperor concluded me to be drowned, and
that the enemy’s fleet was approaching in a
hostile manner: but he was soon eased of
his fears; for the channel growing shallower
every step I made, I came in a short time
within hearing, and holding up the end of the
cable, by which the fleet was fastened, I
cried in a loud voice, “Long live the most
puissant king of Lilliput!” This great prince
received me at my landing with all possible
encomiums, and created me a nardac upon
the spot, which is the highest title of honour
among them.

His majesty desired I would take some
other opportunity of bringing all the rest of
his enemy’s ships into his ports. And so
unmeasureable is the ambition of princes,
that he seemed to think of nothing less than
reducing the whole empire of Blefuscu into
a province, and governing it, by a viceroy; of
destroying the Big-endian exiles, and
compelling that people to break the smaller
end of their eggs, by which he would remain

-24-

generosity, invited me to that kingdom in the
emperor their master’s name, and desired
me to show them some proofs of my
prodigious strength, of which they had
heard so many wonders; wherein I readily
obliged them, but shall not trouble the
reader with the particulars.

When I had for some time entertained their
excellencies, to their infinite satisfaction
and surprise, I desired they would do me the
honour to present my most humble respects
to the emperor their master, the renown of
whose virtues had so justly filled the whole
world with admiration, and whose royal
person I resolved to attend, before I
returned to my own country. Accordingly, the
next time I had the honour to see our
emperor, I desired his general license to
wait on the Blefuscudian monarch, which he
was pleased to grant me, as I could
perceive, in a very cold manner; but could
not guess the reason, till I had a whisper
from a certain person, “that Flimnap and
Bolgolam had represented my intercourse
with those ambassadors as a mark of
disaffection;” from which I am sure my heart
was wholly free. And this was the first time I
began to conceive some imperfect idea of
courts and ministers.

It is to be observed, that these
ambassadors spoke to me, by an
interpreter, the languages of both empires
differing as much from each other as any
two in Europe, and each nation priding itself
upon the antiquity, beauty, and energy of
their own tongue, with an avowed contempt
for that of their neighbour; yet our emperor,
standing upon the advantage he had got by
the seizure of their fleet, obliged them to
deliver their credentials, and make their
speech, in the Lilliputian tongue. And it must
be confessed, that from the great
intercourse of trade and commerce
between both realms, from the continual

-25-

apartment, and were well provided with
buckets, but the water was at some
distance. These buckets were about the
size of large thimbles, and the poor people
supplied me with them as fast as they could:
but the flame was so violent that they did
little good. I might easily have stifled it with
my coat, which I unfortunately left behind me
for haste, and came away only in my
leathern jerkin. The case seemed wholly
desperate and deplorable; and this
magnificent palace would have infallibly
been burnt down to the ground, if, by a
presence of mind unusual to me, I had not
suddenly thought of an expedient. I had, the
evening before, drunk plentifully of a most
delicious wine called glimigrim, (the
Blefuscudians call it flunec, but ours is
esteemed the better sort,) which is very
diuretic. By the luckiest chance in the world,
I had not discharged myself of any part of it.
The heat I had contracted by coming very
near the flames, and by labouring to quench
them, made the wine begin to operate by
urine; which I voided in such a quantity, and
applied so well to the proper places, that in
three minutes the fire was wholly
extinguished, and the rest of that noble pile,
which had cost so many ages in erecting,
preserved from destruction.

It was now day-light, and I returned to my
house without waiting to congratulate with
the emperor: because, although I had done
a very eminent piece of service, yet I could
not tell how his majesty might resent the
manner by which I had performed it: for, by
the fundamental laws of the realm, it is
capital in any person, of what quality
soever, to make water within the precincts
of the palace. But I was a little comforted by
a message from his majesty, “that he would
give orders to the grand justiciary for
passing my pardon in form:” which,
however, I could not obtain; and I was
privately assured, “that the empress,

-26-

I shall say but little at present of their
learning, which, for many ages, has
flourished in all its branches among them:
but their manner of writing is very peculiar,
being neither from the left to the right, like
the Europeans, nor from the right to the left,
like the Arabians, nor from up to down, like
the Chinese, but aslant, from one corner of
the paper to the other, like ladies in
England.

They bury their dead with their heads
directly downward, because they hold an
opinion, that in eleven thousand moons they
are all to rise again; in which period the
earth (which they conceive to be flat) will
turn upside down, and by this means they
shall, at their resurrection, be found ready
standing on their feet. The learned among
them confess the absurdity of this doctrine;
but the practice still continues, in
compliance to the vulgar.

There are some laws and customs in this
empire very peculiar; and if they were not so
directly contrary to those of my own dear
country, I should be tempted to say a little in
their justification. It is only to be wished they
were as well executed. The first I shall
mention, relates to informers. All crimes
against the state, are punished here with
the utmost severity; but, if the person
accused makes his innocence plainly to
appear upon his trial, the accuser is
immediately put to an ignominious death;
and out of his goods or lands the innocent
person is quadruply recompensed for the
loss of his time, for the danger he
underwent, for the hardship of his
imprisonment, and for all the charges he
has been at in making his defence; or, if
that fund be deficient, it is largely supplied
by the crown. The emperor also confers on
him some public mark of his favour, and
proclamation is made of his innocence
through the whole city.

-27-

courts of judicature, is formed with six
eyes, two before, as many behind, and on
each side one, to signify circumspection;
with a bag of gold open in her right hand,
and a sword sheathed in her left, to show
she is more disposed to reward than to
punish.

In choosing persons for all employments,
they have more regard to good morals than
to great abilities; for, since government is
necessary to mankind, they believe, that the
common size of human understanding is
fitted to some station or other; and that
Providence never intended to make the
management of public affairs a mystery to
be comprehended only by a few persons of
sublime genius, of which there seldom are
three born in an age: but they suppose truth,
justice, temperance, and the like, to be in
every man’s power; the practice of which
virtues, assisted by experience and a good
intention, would qualify any man for the
service of his country, except where a
course of study is required. But they thought
the want of moral virtues was so far from
being supplied by superior endowments of
the mind, that employments could never be
put into such dangerous hands as those of
persons so qualified; and, at least, that the
mistakes committed by ignorance, in a
virtuous disposition, would never be of such
fatal consequence to the public weal, as the
practices of a man, whose inclinations led
him to be corrupt, and who had great
abilities to manage, to multiply, and defend
his corruptions.

In like manner, the disbelief of a Divine
Providence renders a man incapable of
holding any public station; for, since kings
avow themselves to be the deputies of
Providence, the Lilliputians think nothing
can be more absurd than for a prince to
employ such men as disown the authority
under which he acts.

-28-

therefore they have in every town public
nurseries, where all parents, except
cottagers and labourers, are obliged to
send their infants of both sexes to be reared
and educated, when they come to the age
of twenty moons, at which time they are
supposed to have some rudiments of
docility. These schools are of several kinds,
suited to different qualities, and both sexes.
They have certain professors well skilled in
preparing children for such a condition of
life as befits the rank of their parents, and
their own capacities, as well as inclinations.
I shall first say something of the male
nurseries, and then of the female.

The nurseries for males of noble or eminent
birth, are provided with grave and learned
professors, and their several deputies. The
clothes and food of the children are plain
and simple. They are bred up in the
principles of honour, justice, courage,
modesty, clemency, religion, and love of
their country; they are always employed in
some business, except in the times of
eating and sleeping, which are very short,
and two hours for diversions consisting of
bodily exercises. They are dressed by men
till four years of age, and then are obliged to
dress themselves, although their quality be
ever so great; and the women attendant,
who are aged proportionably to ours at fifty,
perform only the most menial offices. They
are never suffered to converse with
servants, but go together in smaller or
greater numbers to take their diversions,
and always in the presence of a professor,
or one of his deputies; whereby they avoid
those early bad impressions of folly and
vice, to which our children are subject. Their
parents are suffered to see them only twice
a year; the visit is to last but an hour; they
are allowed to kiss the child at meeting and
parting; but a professor, who always stands
by on those occasions, will not suffer them
to whisper, or use any fondling

-29-

young. When the girls are twelve years old,
which among them is the marriageable
age, their parents or guardians take them
home, with great expressions of gratitude
to the professors, and seldom without tears
of the young lady and her companions.

In the nurseries of females of the meaner
sort, the children are instructed in all kinds
of works proper for their sex, and their
several degrees: those intended for
apprentices are dismissed at seven years
old, the rest are kept to eleven.

The meaner families who have children at
these nurseries, are obliged, besides their
annual pension, which is as low as
possible, to return to the steward of the
nursery a small monthly share of their
gettings, to be a portion for the child; and
therefore all parents are limited in their
expenses by the law. For the Lilliputians
think nothing can be more unjust, than for
people, in subservience to their own
appetites, to bring children into the world,
and leave the burthen of supporting them on
the public. As to persons of quality, they
give security to appropriate a certain sum
for each child, suitable to their condition;
and these funds are always managed with
good husbandry and the most exact justice.

The cottagers and labourers keep their
children at home, their business being only
to till and cultivate the earth, and therefore
their education is of little consequence to
the public: but the old and diseased among
them, are supported by hospitals; for
begging is a trade unknown in this empire.

And here it may, perhaps, divert the curious
reader, to give some account of my
domestics, and my manner of living in this
country, during a residence of nine months,
and thirteen days. Having a head
mechanically turned, and being likewise

-30-

with dishes of meat, and some with barrels
of wine and other liquors slung on their
shoulders; all which the waiters above drew
up, as I wanted, in a very ingenious manner,
by certain cords, as we draw the bucket up
a well in Europe. A dish of their meat was a
good mouthful, and a barrel of their liquor a
reasonable draught. Their mutton yields to
ours, but their beef is excellent. I have had a
sirloin so large, that I have been forced to
make three bites of it; but this is rare. My
servants were astonished to see me eat it,
bones and all, as in our country we do the
leg of a lark. Their geese and turkeys I
usually ate at a mouthful, and I confess they
far exceed ours. Of their smaller fowl I could
take up twenty or thirty at the end of my
knife.

One day his imperial majesty, being
informed of my way of living, desired “that
himself and his royal consort, with the young
princes of the blood of both sexes, might
have the happiness,” as he was pleased to
call it, “of dining with me.” They came
accordingly, and I placed them in chairs of
state, upon my table, just over against me,
with their guards about them. Flimnap, the
lord high treasurer, attended there likewise
with his white staff; and I observed he often
looked on me with a sour countenance,
which I would not seem to regard, but ate
more than usual, in honour to my dear
country, as well as to fill the court with
admiration. I have some private reasons to
believe, that this visit from his majesty gave
Flimnap an opportunity of doing me ill
offices to his master. That minister had
always been my secret enemy, though he
outwardly caressed me more than was
usual to the moroseness of his nature. He
represented to the emperor “the low
condition of his treasury; that he was forced
to take up money at a great discount; that
exchequer bills would not circulate under
nine per cent. below par; that I had cost his

-31-

the treasurer, or his two informers (I will
name them, and let them make the best of
it) Clustril and Drunlo, to prove that any
person ever came to me incognito, except
the secretary Reldresal, who was sent by
express command of his imperial majesty,
as I have before related. I should not have
dwelt so long upon this particular, if it had
not been a point wherein the reputation of a
great lady is so nearly concerned, to say
nothing of my own; though I then had the
honour to be a nardac, which the treasurer
himself is not; for all the world knows, that
he is only a glumglum, a title inferior by one
degree, as that of a marquis is to a duke in
England; yet I allow he preceded me in right
of his post. These false informations, which
I afterwards came to the knowledge of by
an accident not proper to mention, made
the treasurer show his lady for some time an
ill countenance, and me a worse; and
although he was at last undeceived and
reconciled to her, yet I lost all credit with
him, and found my interest decline very fast
with the emperor himself, who was, indeed,
too much governed by that favourite.

CHAPTER VII.

[The author, being informed of a design to
accuse him of high-treason, makes his
escape to Blefuscu. His reception there.]

Before I proceed to give an account of my
leaving this kingdom, it may be proper to
inform the reader of a private intrigue which
had been for two months forming against
me.

I had been hitherto, all my life, a stranger to
courts, for which I was unqualified by the
meanness of my condition. I had indeed
heard and read enough of the dispositions
of great princes and ministers, but never
expected to have found such terrible effects
of them, in so remote a country, governed,

-32-

treason and other capital crimes.”

This preface made me so impatient, being
conscious of my own merits and innocence,
that I was going to interrupt him; when he
entreated me to be silent, and thus
proceeded:

“Out of gratitude for the favours you have
done me, I procured information of the
whole proceedings, and a copy of the
articles; wherein I venture my head for your
service.

“‘Articles of Impeachment against
QUINBUS FLESTRIN, (the Man-Mountain.)


ARTICLE I.
“‘Whereas, by a statute made in the reign of
his imperial majesty Calin Deffar Plune, it
is enacted, that, whoever shall make water
within the precincts of the royal palace, shall
be liable to the pains and penalties of high-
treason; notwithstanding, the said Quinbus
Flestrin, in open breach of the said law,
under colour of extinguishing the fire kindled
in the apartment of his majesty’s most dear
imperial consort, did maliciously,
traitorously, and devilishly, by discharge of
his urine, put out the said fire kindled in the
said apartment, lying and being within the
precincts of the said royal palace, against
the statute in that case provided, etc.
against the duty, etc.
ARTICLE II.
“‘That the said Quinbus Flestrin, having
brought the imperial fleet of Blefuscu into
the royal port, and being afterwards
commanded by his imperial majesty to
seize all the other ships of the said empire
of Blefuscu, and reduce that empire to a
province, to be governed by a viceroy from
hence, and to destroy and put to death, not
only all the Big-endian exiles, but likewise
all the people of that empire who would not

-33-

on the face and hands. Some of your
servants were to have private orders to
strew a poisonous juice on your shirts and
sheets, which would soon make you tear
your own flesh, and die in the utmost torture.
The general came into the same opinion; so
that for a long time there was a majority
against you; but his majesty resolving, if
possible, to spare your life, at last brought
off the chamberlain.

“Upon this incident, Reldresal, principal
secretary for private affairs, who always
approved himself your true friend, was
commanded by the emperor to deliver his
opinion, which he accordingly did; and
therein justified the good thoughts you have
of him. He allowed your crimes to be great,
but that still there was room for mercy, the
most commendable virtue in a prince, and
for which his majesty was so justly
celebrated. He said, the friendship
between you and him was so well known to
the world, that perhaps the most honourable
board might think him partial; however, in
obedience to the command he had
received, he would freely offer his
sentiments. That if his majesty, in
consideration of your services, and
pursuant to his own merciful disposition,
would please to spare your life, and only
give orders to put out both your eyes, he
humbly conceived, that by this expedient
justice might in some measure be
satisfied, and all the world would applaud
the lenity of the emperor, as well as the fair
and generous proceedings of those who
have the honour to be his counsellors. That
the loss of your eyes would be no
impediment to your bodily strength, by
which you might still be useful to his
majesty; that blindness is an addition to
courage, by concealing dangers from us;
that the fear you had for your eyes, was the
greatest difficulty in bringing over the
enemy’s fleet, and it would be sufficient for

-34-

against capital punishment, was graciously
pleased to say, that since the council
thought the loss of your eyes too easy a
censure, some other way may be inflicted
hereafter. And your friend the secretary,
humbly desiring to be heard again, in
answer to what the treasurer had objected,
concerning the great charge his majesty
was at in maintaining you, said, that his
excellency, who had the sole disposal of the
emperor’s revenue, might easily provide
against that evil, by gradually lessening your
establishment; by which, for want of
sufficient for you would grow weak and
faint, and lose your appetite, and
consequently, decay, and consume in a few
months; neither would the stench of your
carcass be then so dangerous, when it
should become more than half diminished;
and immediately upon your death five or six
thousand of his majesty’s subjects might,
in two or three days, cut your flesh from your
bones, take it away by cart-loads, and bury
it in distant parts, to prevent infection,
leaving the skeleton as a monument of
admiration to posterity.

“Thus, by the great friendship of the
secretary, the whole affair was
compromised. It was strictly enjoined, that
the project of starving you by degrees
should be kept a secret; but the sentence of
putting out your eyes was entered on the
books; none dissenting, except Bolgolam
the admiral, who, being a creature of the
empress, was perpetually instigated by her
majesty to insist upon your death, she
having borne perpetual malice against you,
on account of that infamous and illegal
method you took to extinguish the fire in her
apartment.

“In three days your friend the secretary will
be directed to come to your house, and
read before you the articles of
impeachment; and then to signify the great

-35-

they would admit of some extenuation. But
having in my life perused many state-trials,
which I ever observed to terminate as the
judges thought fit to direct, I durst not rely on
so dangerous a decision, in so critical a
juncture, and against such powerful
enemies. Once I was strongly bent upon
resistance, for, while I had liberty the whole
strength of that empire could hardly subdue
me, and I might easily with stones pelt the
metropolis to pieces; but I soon rejected
that project with horror, by remembering the
oath I had made to the emperor, the favours
I received from him, and the high title of
nardac he conferred upon me. Neither had I
so soon learned the gratitude of courtiers,
to persuade myself, that his majesty’s
present seventies acquitted me of all past
obligations.

At last, I fixed upon a resolution, for which it
is probable I may incur some censure, and
not unjustly; for I confess I owe the
preserving of mine eyes, and consequently
my liberty, to my own great rashness and
want of experience; because, if I had then
known the nature of princes and ministers,
which I have since observed in many other
courts, and their methods of treating
criminals less obnoxious than myself, I
should, with great alacrity and readiness,
have submitted to so easy a punishment.
But hurried on by the precipitancy of youth,
and having his imperial majesty’s license to
pay my attendance upon the emperor of
Blefuscu, I took this opportunity, before the
three days were elapsed, to send a letter to
my friend the secretary, signifying my
resolution of setting out that morning for
Blefuscu, pursuant to the leave I had got;
and, without waiting for an answer, I went to
that side of the island where our fleet lay. I
seized a large man of war, tied a cable to
the prow, and, lifting up the anchors, I
stripped myself, put my clothes (together
with my coverlet, which I carried under my

-36-

means to leave Blefuscu; and, after some
difficulties, returns safe to his native
country.]

Three days after my arrival, walking out of
curiosity to the north-east coast of the
island, I observed, about half a league off in
the sea, somewhat that looked like a boat
overturned. I pulled off my shoes and
stockings, and, wailing two or three
hundred yards, I found the object to
approach nearer by force of the tide; and
then plainly saw it to be a real boat, which I
supposed might by some tempest have
been driven from a ship. Whereupon, I
returned immediately towards the city, and
desired his imperial majesty to lend me
twenty of the tallest vessels he had left, after
the loss of his fleet, and three thousand
seamen, under the command of his vice-
admiral. This fleet sailed round, while I went
back the shortest way to the coast, where I
first discovered the boat. I found the tide
had driven it still nearer. The seamen were
all provided with cordage, which I had
beforehand twisted to a sufficient strength.
When the ships came up, I stripped myself,
and waded till I came within a hundred yards
off the boat, after which I was forced to
swim till I got up to it. The seamen threw me
the end of the cord, which I fastened to a
hole in the fore-part of the boat, and the
other end to a man of war; but I found all my
labour to little purpose; for, being out of my
depth, I was not able to work. In this
necessity I was forced to swim behind, and
push the boat forward, as often as I could,
with one of my hands; and the tide favouring
me, I advanced so far that I could just hold
up my chin and feel the ground. I rested two
or three minutes, and then gave the boat
another shove, and so on, till the sea was no
higher than my arm-pits; and now, the most
laborious part being over, I took out my
other cables, which were stowed in one of
the ships, and fastened them first to the

-37-

mine eyes; that I had fled from justice; and
if I did not return in two hours, I should be
deprived of my title of nardac, and declared
a traitor.” The envoy further added, “that in
order to maintain the peace and amity
between both empires, his master
expected that his brother of Blefuscu would
give orders to have me sent back to Lilliput,
bound hand and foot, to be punished as a
traitor.”

The emperor of Blefuscu, having taken
three days to consult, returned an answer
consisting of many civilities and excuses.
He said, “that as for sending me bound, his
brother knew it was impossible; that,
although I had deprived him of his fleet, yet
he owed great obligations to me for many
good offices I had done him in making the
peace. That, however, both their majesties
would soon be made easy; for I had found a
prodigious vessel on the shore, able to
carry me on the sea, which he had given
orders to fit up, with my own assistance and
direction; and he hoped, in a few weeks,
both empires would be freed from so
insupportable an encumbrance.”

With this answer the envoy returned to
Lilliput; and the monarch of Blefuscu related
to me all that had passed; offering me at the
same time (but under the strictest
confidence) his gracious protection, if I
would continue in his service; wherein,
although I believed him sincere, yet I
resolved never more to put any confidence
in princes or ministers, where I could
possibly avoid it; and therefore, with all due
acknowledgments for his favourable
intentions, I humbly begged to be excused. I
told him, “that since fortune, whether good
or evil, had thrown a vessel in my way, I was
resolved to venture myself on the ocean,
rather than be an occasion of difference
between two such mighty monarchs.”
Neither did I find the emperor at all

-38-

cooks could provide. I took with me six
cows and two bulls alive, with as many
ewes and rams, intending to carry them into
my own country, and propagate the breed.
And to feed them on board, I had a good
bundle of hay, and a bag of corn. I would
gladly have taken a dozen of the natives, but
this was a thing the emperor would by no
means permit; and, besides a diligent
search into my pockets, his majesty
engaged my honour “not to carry away any
of his subjects, although with their own
consent and desire.”

Having thus prepared all things as well as I
was able, I set sail on the twenty-fourth day
of September 1701, at six in the morning; and
when I had gone about four-leagues to the
northward, the wind being at south-east, at
six in the evening I descried a small island,
about half a league to the north-west. I
advanced forward, and cast anchor on the
lee-side of the island, which seemed to be
uninhabited. I then took some refreshment,
and went to my rest. I slept well, and as I
conjectured at least six hours, for I found the
day broke in two hours after I awaked. It
was a clear night. I ate my breakfast before
the sun was up; and heaving anchor, the
wind being favourable, I steered the same
course that I had done the day before,
wherein I was directed by my pocket
compass. My intention was to reach, if
possible, one of those islands. which I had
reason to believe lay to the north-east of
Van Diemen’s Land. I discovered nothing
all that day; but upon the next, about three in
the afternoon, when I had by my
computation made twenty-four leagues
from Blefuscu, I descried a sail steering to
the south-east; my course was due east. I
hailed her, but could get no answer; yet I
found I gained upon her, for the wind
slackened. I made all the sail I could, and in
half an hour she spied me, then hung out her
ancient, and discharged a gun. It is not easy

-39-

set them a-grazing in a bowling-green at
Greenwich, where the fineness of the grass
made them feed very heartily, though I had
always feared the contrary: neither could I
possibly have preserved them in so long a
voyage, if the captain had not allowed me
some of his best biscuit, which, rubbed to
powder, and mingled with water, was their
constant food. The short time I continued in
England, I made a considerable profit by
showing my cattle to many persons of
quality and others: and before I began my
second voyage, I sold them for six hundred
pounds. Since my last return I find the breed
is considerably increased, especially the
sheep, which I hope will prove much to the
advantage of the woollen manufacture, by
the fineness of the fleeces.

I stayed but two months with my wife and
family, for my insatiable desire of seeing
foreign countries, would suffer me to
continue no longer. I left fifteen hundred
pounds with my wife, and fixed her in a
good house at Redriff. My remaining stock I
carried with me, part in money and part in
goods, in hopes to improve my fortunes. My
eldest uncle John had left me an estate in
land, near Epping, of about thirty pounds a-
year; and I had a long lease of the Black Bull
in Fetter-Lane, which yielded me as much
more; so that I was not in any danger of
leaving my family upon the parish. My son
Johnny, named so after his uncle, was at
the grammar-school, and a towardly child.
My daughter Betty (who is now well
married, and has children) was then at her
needle-work. I took leave of my wife, and
boy and girl, with tears on both sides, and
went on board the Adventure, a merchant
ship of three hundred tons, bound for Surat,
captain John Nicholas, of Liverpool,
commander. But my account of this voyage
must be referred to the Second Part of my
Travels.

-40-

happened the day following: for the
southern wind, called the southern
monsoon, began to set in.

Finding it was likely to overblow, we took in
our sprit-sail, and stood by to hand the fore-
sail; but making foul weather, we looked the
guns were all fast, and handed the mizen.
The ship lay very broad off, so we thought it
better spooning before the sea, than trying
or hulling. We reefed the fore-sail and set
him, and hauled aft the fore-sheet; the helm
was hard a-weather. The ship wore
bravely. We belayed the fore down-haul; but
the sail was split, and we hauled down the
yard, and got the sail into the ship, and
unbound all the things clear of it. It was a
very fierce storm; the sea broke strange
and dangerous. We hauled off upon the
laniard of the whip-staff, and helped the
man at the helm. We would not get down our
topmast, but let all stand, because she
scudded before the sea very well, and we
knew that the top-mast being aloft, the ship
was the wholesomer, and made better way
through the sea, seeing we had sea-room.
When the storm was over, we set fore-sail
and main-sail, and brought the ship to. Then
we set the mizen, main-top-sail, and the
fore-top-sail. Our course was east-north-
east, the wind was at south-west. We got
the starboard tacks aboard, we cast off our
weather-braces and lifts; we set in the lee-
braces, and hauled forward by the weather-
bowlings, and hauled them tight, and
belayed them, and hauled over the mizen
tack to windward, and kept her full and by
as near as she would lie.

During this storm, which was followed by a
strong wind west-south-west, we were
carried, by my computation, about five
hundred leagues to the east, so that the
oldest sailor on board could not tell in what
part of the world we were. Our provisions
held out well, our ship was staunch, and our

-41-

which first surprised me was the length of
the grass, which, in those grounds that
seemed to be kept for hay, was about
twenty feet high.

I fell into a high road, for so I took it to be,
though it served to the inhabitants only as a
foot-path through a field of barley. Here I
walked on for some time, but could see little
on either side, it being now near harvest,
and the corn rising at least forty feet. I was
an hour walking to the end of this field,
which was fenced in with a hedge of at least
one hundred and twenty feet high, and the
trees so lofty that I could make no
computation of their altitude. There was a
stile to pass from this field into the next. It
had four steps, and a stone to cross over
when you came to the uppermost. It was
impossible for me to climb this stile,
because every step was six-feet high, and
the upper stone about twenty. I was
endeavouring to find some gap in the
hedge, when I discovered one of the
inhabitants in the next field, advancing
towards the stile, of the same size with him
whom I saw in the sea pursuing our boat. He
appeared as tall as an ordinary spire
steeple, and took about ten yards at every
stride, as near as I could guess. I was struck
with the utmost fear and astonishment, and
ran to hide myself in the corn, whence I saw
him at the top of the stile looking back into
the next field on the right hand, and heard
him call in a voice many degrees louder than
a speaking-trumpet: but the noise was so
high in the air, that at first I certainly thought it
was thunder. Whereupon seven monsters,
like himself, came towards him with
reaping-hooks in their hands, each hook
about the largeness of six scythes. These
people were not so well clad as the first,
whose servants or labourers they seemed
to be; for, upon some words he spoke, they
went to reap the corn in the field where I lay. I
kept from them at as great a distance as I

-42-

diminutive with respect to them, as they
were to me. And who knows but that even
this prodigious race of mortals might be
equally overmatched in some distant part of
the world, whereof we have yet no
discovery.

Scared and confounded as I was, I could
not forbear going on with these reflections,
when one of the reapers, approaching
within ten yards of the ridge where I lay,
made me apprehend that with the next step I
should be squashed to death under his foot,
or cut in two with his reaping-hook. And
therefore, when he was again about to
move, I screamed as loud as fear could
make me: whereupon the huge creature
trod short, and, looking round about under
him for some time, at last espied me as I lay
on the ground. He considered awhile, with
the caution of one who endeavours to lay
hold on a small dangerous animal in such a
manner that it shall not be able either to
scratch or bite him, as I myself have
sometimes done with a weasel in England.
At length he ventured to take me behind, by
the middle, between his fore-finger and
thumb, and brought me within three yards of
his eyes, that he might behold my shape
more perfectly. I guessed his meaning, and
my good fortune gave me so much
presence of mind, that I resolved not to
struggle in the least as he held me in the air
above sixty feet from the ground, although
he grievously pinched my sides, for fear I
should slip through his fingers. All I ventured
was to raise mine eyes towards the sun,
and place my hands together in a
supplicating posture, and to speak some
words in a humble melancholy tone,
suitable to the condition I then was in: for I
apprehended every moment that he would
dash me against the ground, as we usually
do any little hateful animal, which we have a
mind to destroy. But my good star would
have it, that he appeared pleased with my

-43-

purse, and, opening it, poured all the gold
into his palm. There were six Spanish
pieces of four pistoles each, beside twenty
or thirty smaller coins. I saw him wet the tip
of his little finger upon his tongue, and take
up one of my largest pieces, and then
another; but he seemed to be wholly
ignorant what they were. He made me a
sign to put them again into my purse, and
the purse again into my pocket, which, after
offering it to him several times, I thought it
best to do.

The farmer, by this time, was convinced I
must be a rational creature. He spoke often
to me; but the sound of his voice pierced my
ears like that of a water-mill, yet his words
were articulate enough. I answered as loud
as I could in several languages, and he
often laid his ear within two yards of me: but
all in vain, for we were wholly unintelligible
to each other. He then sent his servants to
their work, and taking his handkerchief out
of his pocket, he doubled and spread it on
his left hand, which he placed flat on the
ground with the palm upward, making me a
sign to step into it, as I could easily do, for it
was not above a foot in thickness. I thought
it my part to obey, and, for fear of falling,
laid myself at full length upon the
handkerchief, with the remainder of which
he lapped me up to the head for further
security, and in this manner carried me
home to his house. There he called his wife,
and showed me to her; but she screamed
and ran back, as women in England do at
the sight of a toad or a spider. However,
when she had a while seen my behaviour,
and how well I observed the signs her
husband made, she was soon reconciled,
and by degrees grew extremely tender of
me.

It was about twelve at noon, and a servant
brought in dinner. It was only one substantial
dish of meat (fit for the plain condition of a

-44-

might owe me a spite, and well
remembering how mischievous all children
among us naturally are to sparrows, rabbits,
young kittens, and puppy dogs, I fell on my
knees, and pointing to the boy, made my
master to understand, as well as I could,
that I desired his son might be pardoned.
The father complied, and the lad took his
seat again, whereupon I went to him, and
kissed his hand, which my master took, and
made him stroke me gently with it.

In the midst of dinner, my mistress’s
favourite cat leaped into her lap. I heard a
noise behind me like that of a dozen
stocking-weavers at work; and turning my
head, I found it proceeded from the purring
of that animal, who seemed to be three
times larger than an ox, as I computed by
the view of her head, and one of her paws,
while her mistress was feeding and
stroking her. The fierceness of this
creature’s countenance altogether
discomposed me; though I stood at the
farther end of the table, above fifty feet off;
and although my mistress held her fast, for
fear she might give a spring, and seize me
in her talons. But it happened there was no
danger, for the cat took not the least notice
of me when my master placed me within
three yards of her. And as I have been
always told, and found true by experience in
my travels, that flying or discovering fear
before a fierce animal, is a certain way to
make it pursue or attack you, so I resolved,
in this dangerous juncture, to show no
manner of concern. I walked with intrepidity
five or six times before the very head of the
cat, and came within half a yard of her;
whereupon she drew herself back, as if she
were more afraid of me: I had less
apprehension concerning the dogs,
whereof three or four came into the room,
as it is usual in farmers’ houses; one of
which was a mastiff, equal in bulk to four
elephants, and another a greyhound,

-45-

complexion of those diminutive people
appeared to me the fairest in the world; and
talking upon this subject with a person of
learning there, who was an intimate friend
of mine, he said that my face appeared
much fairer and smoother when he looked
on me from the ground, than it did upon a
nearer view, when I took him up in my hand,
and brought him close, which he confessed
was at first a very shocking sight. He said,
“he could discover great holes in my skin;
that the stumps of my beard were ten times
stronger than the bristles of a boar, and my
complexion made up of several colours
altogether disagreeable:” although I must
beg leave to say for myself, that I am as fair
as most of my sex and country, and very little
sunburnt by all my travels. On the other side,
discoursing of the ladies in that emperor’s
court, he used to tell me, “one had freckles;
another too wide a mouth; a third too large a
nose;” nothing of which I was able to
distinguish. I confess this reflection was
obvious enough; which, however, I could
not forbear, lest the reader might think those
vast creatures were actually deformed: for I
must do them the justice to say, they are a
comely race of people, and particularly the
features of my master’s countenance,
although he was but a farmer, when I beheld
him from the height of sixty feet, appeared
very well proportioned.

When dinner was done, my master went out
to his labourers, and, as I could discover by
his voice and gesture, gave his wife strict
charge to take care of me. I was very much
tired, and disposed to sleep, which my
mistress perceiving, she put me on her own
bed, and covered me with a clean white
handkerchief, but larger and coarser than
the mainsail of a man-of-war.

I slept about two hours, and dreamt I was at
home with my wife and children, which
aggravated my sorrows when I awaked,

-46-

was not hurt; whereat she was extremely
rejoiced, calling the maid to take up the
dead rat with a pair of tongs, and throw it
out of the window. Then she set me on a
table, where I showed her my hanger all
bloody, and wiping it on the lappet of my
coat, returned it to the scabbard. I was
pressed to do more than one thing which
another could not do for me, and therefore
endeavoured to make my mistress
understand, that I desired to be set down on
the floor; which after she had done, my
bashfulness would not suffer me to express
myself farther, than by pointing to the door,
and bowing several times. The good
woman, with much difficulty, at last
perceived what I would be at, and taking me
up again in her hand, walked into the
garden, where she set me down. I went on
one side about two hundred yards, and
beckoning to her not to look or to follow me,
I hid myself between two leaves of sorrel,
and there discharged the necessities of
nature.

I hope the gentle reader will excuse me for
dwelling on these and the like particulars,
which, however insignificant they may
appear to groveling vulgar minds, yet will
certainly help a philosopher to enlarge his
thoughts and imagination, and apply them
to the benefit of public as well as private
life, which was my sole design in presenting
this and other accounts of my travels to the
world; wherein I have been chiefly studious
of truth, without affecting any ornaments of
learning or of style. But the whole scene of
this voyage made so strong an impression
on my mind, and is so deeply fixed in my
memory, that, in committing it to paper I did
not omit one material circumstance:
however, upon a strict review, I blotted out
several passages. Of less moment which
were in my first copy, for fear of being
censured as tedious and trifling, whereof
travellers are often, perhaps not without

-47-

omitted this honourable mention of her care
and affection towards me, which I heartily
wish it lay in my power to requite as she
deserves, instead of being the innocent, but
unhappy instrument of her disgrace, as I
have too much reason to fear.

It now began to be known and talked of in
the neighbourhood, that my master had
found a strange animal in the field, about
the bigness of a splacnuck, but exactly
shaped in every part like a human creature;
which it likewise imitated in all its actions;
seemed to speak in a little language of its
own, had already learned several words of
theirs, went erect upon two legs, was tame
and gentle, would come when it was called,
do whatever it was bid, had the finest limbs
in the world, and a complexion fairer than a
nobleman’s daughter of three years old.
Another farmer, who lived hard by, and was
a particular friend of my master, came on a
visit on purpose to inquire into the truth of
this story. I was immediately produced, and
placed upon a table, where I walked as I
was commanded, drew my hanger, put it up
again, made my reverence to my master’s
guest, asked him in his own language how
he did, and told him he was welcome, just
as my little nurse had instructed me. This
man, who was old and dim-sighted, put on
his spectacles to behold me better; at which
I could not forbear laughing very heartily, for
his eyes appeared like the full moon shining
into a chamber at two windows. Our
people, who discovered the cause of my
mirth, bore me company in laughing, at
which the old fellow was fool enough to be
angry and out of countenance. He had the
character of a great miser; and, to my
misfortune, he well deserved it, by the
cursed advice he gave my master, to show
me as a sight upon a market-day in the next
town, which was half an hour’s riding, about
two-and-twenty miles from our house. I
guessed there was some mischief when I

-48-

lie down on. However, I was terribly shaken
and discomposed in this journey, though it
was but of half an hour: for the horse went
about forty feet at every step and trotted so
high, that the agitation was equal to the
rising and falling of a ship in a great storm,
but much more frequent. Our journey was
somewhat farther than from London to St.
Alban’s. My master alighted at an inn which
he used to frequent; and after consulting
awhile with the inn-keeper, and making
some necessary preparations, he hired the
grultrud, or crier, to give notice through the
town of a strange creature to be seen at the
sign of the Green Eagle, not so big as a
splacnuck (an animal in that country very
finely shaped, about six feet long,) and in
every part of the body resembling a human
creature, could speak several words, and
perform a hundred diverting tricks.

I was placed upon a table in the largest
room of the inn, which might be near three
hundred feet square. My little nurse stood on
a low stool close to the table, to take care of
me, and direct what I should do. My master,
to avoid a crowd, would suffer only thirty
people at a time to see me. I walked about
on the table as the girl commanded; she
asked me questions, as far as she knew my
understanding of the language reached,
and I answered them as loud as I could. I
turned about several times to the company,
paid my humble respects, said they were
welcome, and used some other speeches I
had been taught. I took up a thimble filled
with liquor, which Glumdalclitch had given
me for a cup, and drank their health, I drew
out my hanger, and flourished with it after
the manner of fencers in England. My nurse
gave me a part of a straw, which I exercised
as a pike, having learnt the art in my youth. I
was that day shown to twelve sets of
company, and as often forced to act over
again the same fopperies, till I was half
dead with weariness and vexation; for

-49-

his affairs at home, he took leave of his
wife, and upon the 17th of August, 1703, about
two months after my arrival, we set out for
the metropolis, situate near the middle of
that empire, and about three thousand miles
distance from our house. My master made
his daughter Glumdalclitch ride behind him.
She carried me on her lap, in a box tied
about her waist. The girl had lined it on all
sides with the softest cloth she could get,
well quilted underneath, furnished it with her
baby’s bed, provided me with linen and
other necessaries, and made everything as
convenient as she could. We had no other
company but a boy of the house, who rode
after us with the luggage.

My master’s design was to show me in all
the towns by the way, and to step out of the
road for fifty or a hundred miles, to any
village, or person of quality’s house, where
he might expect custom. We made easy
journeys, of not above seven or eight score
miles a-day; for Glumdalclitch, on purpose
to spare me, complained she was tired with
the trotting of the horse. She often took me
out of my box, at my own desire, to give me
air, and show me the country, but always
held me fast by a leading-string. We passed
over five or six rivers, many degrees
broader and deeper than the Nile or the
Ganges: and there was hardly a rivulet so
small as the Thames at London-bridge. We
were ten weeks in our journey, and I was
shown in eighteen large towns, besides
many villages, and private families.

On the 26th day of October we arrived at the
metropolis, called in their language
Lorbrulgrud, or Pride of the Universe. My
master took a lodging in the principal street
of the city, not far from the royal palace, and
put out bills in the usual form, containing an
exact description of my person and parts.
He hired a large room between three and
four hundred feet wide. He provided a table

-50-

beauty, behaviour, and good sense. Her
majesty, and those who attended her, were
beyond measure delighted with my
demeanour. I fell on my knees, and begged
the honour of kissing her imperial foot; but
this gracious princess held out her little
finger towards me, after I was set on the
table, which I embraced in both my arms,
and put the tip of it with the utmost respect to
my lip. She made me some general
questions about my country and my travels,
which I answered as distinctly, and in as
few words as I could. She asked, “whether I
could be content to live at court?” I bowed
down to the board of the table, and humbly
answered “that I was my master’s slave:
but, if I were at my own disposal, I should be
proud to devote my life to her majesty’s
service.” She then asked my master,
“whether he was willing to sell me at a good
price?” He, who apprehended I could not
live a month, was ready enough to part with
me, and demanded a thousand pieces of
gold, which were ordered him on the spot,
each piece being about the bigness of eight
hundred moidores; but allowing for the
proportion of all things between that country
and Europe, and the high price of gold
among them, was hardly so great a sum as
a thousand guineas would be in England. I
then said to the queen, “since I was now her
majesty’s most humble creature and
vassal, I must beg the favour, that
Glumdalclitch, who had always tended me
with so much care and kindness, and
understood to do it so well, might be
admitted into her service, and continue to
be my nurse and instructor.”

Her majesty agreed to my petition, and
easily got the farmer’s consent, who was
glad enough to have his daughter preferred
at court, and the poor girl herself was not
able to hide her joy. My late master
withdrew, bidding me farewell, and saying
he had left me in a good service; to which I

-51-

at first view, asked the queen after a cold
manner “how long it was since she grew
fond of a splacnuck?” for such it seems he
took me to be, as I lay upon my breast in her
majesty’s right hand. But this princess, who
has an infinite deal of wit and humour, set
me gently on my feet upon the scrutoire, and
commanded me to give his majesty an
account of myself, which I did in a very few
words: and Glumdalclitch who attended at
the cabinet door, and could not endure I
should be out of her sight, being admitted,
confirmed all that had passed from my
arrival at her father’s house.

The king, although he be as learned a
person as any in his dominions, had been
educated in the study of philosophy, and
particularly mathematics; yet when he
observed my shape exactly, and saw me
walk erect, before I began to speak,
conceived I might be a piece of clock-work
(which is in that country arrived to a very
great perfection) contrived by some
ingenious artist. But when he heard my
voice, and found what I delivered to be
regular and rational, he could not conceal
his astonishment. He was by no means
satisfied with the relation I gave him of the
manner I came into his kingdom, but thought
it a story concerted between Glumdalclitch
and her father, who had taught me a set of
words to make me sell at a better price.
Upon this imagination, he put several other
questions to me, and still received rational
answers: no otherwise defective than by a
foreign accent, and an imperfect
knowledge in the language, with some
rustic phrases which I had learned at the
farmer’s house, and did not suit the polite
style of a court.

His majesty sent for three great scholars,
who were then in their weekly waiting,
according to the custom in that country.
These gentlemen, after they had a while

-52-

several millions of both sexes, and of my
own stature; where the animals, trees, and
houses, were all in proportion, and where,
by consequence, I might be as able to
defend myself, and to find sustenance, as
any of his majesty’s subjects could do
here; which I took for a full answer to those
gentlemen’s arguments.” To this they only
replied with a smile of contempt, saying,
“that the farmer had instructed me very well
in my lesson.” The king, who had a much
better understanding, dismissing his
learned men, sent for the farmer, who by
good fortune was not yet gone out of town.
Having therefore first examined him
privately, and then confronted him with me
and the young girl, his majesty began to
think that what we told him might possibly
be true. He desired the queen to order that a
particular care should be taken of me; and
was of opinion that Glumdalclitch should still
continue in her office of tending me,
because he observed we had a great
affection for each other. A convenient
apartment was provided for her at court:
she had a sort of governess appointed to
take care of her education, a maid to dress
her, and two other servants for menial
offices; but the care of me was wholly
appropriated to herself. The queen
commanded her own cabinet-maker to
contrive a box, that might serve me for a
bedchamber, after the model that
Glumdalclitch and I should agree upon. This
man was a most ingenious artist, and
according to my direction, in three weeks
finished for me a wooden chamber of
sixteen feet square, and twelve high, with
sash-windows, a door, and two closets,
like a London bed-chamber. The board,
that made the ceiling, was to be lifted up
and down by two hinges, to put in a bed
ready furnished by her majesty’s
upholsterer, which Glumdalclitch took out
every day to air, made it with her own
hands, and letting it down at night, locked

-53-

dishes, out of which I carved for myself, and
her diversion was to see me eat in
miniature: for the queen (who had indeed
but a weak stomach) took up, at one
mouthful, as much as a dozen English
farmers could eat at a meal, which to me
was for some time a very nauseous sight.
She would craunch the wing of a lark, bones
and all, between her teeth, although it were
nine times as large as that of a full-grown
turkey; and put a bit of bread into her mouth
as big as two twelve-penny loaves. She
drank out of a golden cup, above a
hogshead at a draught. Her knives were
twice as long as a scythe, set straight upon
the handle. The spoons, forks, and other
instruments, were all in the same
proportion. I remember when Glumdalclitch
carried me, out of curiosity, to see some of
the tables at court, where ten or a dozen of
those enormous knives and forks were
lifted up together, I thought I had never till
then beheld so terrible a sight.

It is the custom, that every Wednesday
(which, as I have observed, is their
Sabbath) the king and queen, with the royal
issue of both sexes, dine together in the
apartment of his majesty, to whom I was
now become a great favourite; and at these
times, my little chair and table were placed
at his left hand, before one of the salt-
cellars. This prince took a pleasure in
conversing with me, inquiring into the
manners, religion, laws, government, and
learning of Europe; wherein I gave him the
best account I was able. His apprehension
was so clear, and his judgment so exact,
that he made very wise reflections and
observations upon all I said. But I confess,
that, after I had been a little too copious in
talking of my own beloved country, of our
trade and wars by sea and land, of our
schisms in religion, and parties in the state;
the prejudices of his education prevailed so
far, that he could not forbear taking me up in

-54-

more ridiculous than the comparison; so
that I really began to imagine myself
dwindled many degrees below my usual
size.

Nothing angered and mortified me so much
as the queen’s dwarf; who being of the
lowest stature that was ever in that country
(for I verily think he was not full thirty feet
high), became so insolent at seeing a
creature so much beneath him, that he
would always affect to swagger and look
big as he passed by me in the queen’s
antechamber, while I was standing on some
table talking with the lords or ladies of the
court, and he seldom failed of a smart word
or two upon my littleness; against which I
could only revenge myself by calling him
brother, challenging him to wrestle, and
such repartees as are usually in the mouths
of court pages. One day, at dinner, this
malicious little cub was so nettled with
something I had said to him, that, raising
himself upon the frame of her majesty’s
chair, he took me up by the middle, as I was
sitting down, not thinking any harm, and let
me drop into a large silver bowl of cream,
and then ran away as fast as he could. I fell
over head and ears, and, if I had not been a
good swimmer, it might have gone very
hard with me; for Glumdalclitch in that
instant happened to be at the other end of
the room, and the queen was in such a
fright, that she wanted presence of mind to
assist me. But my little nurse ran to my relief,
and took me out, after I had swallowed
above a quart of cream. I was put to bed:
however, I received no other damage than
the loss of a suit of clothes, which was
utterly spoiled. The dwarf was soundly
whipt, and as a farther punishment, forced
to drink up the bowl of cream into which he
had thrown me: neither was he ever
restored to favour; for soon after the queen
bestowed him on a lady of high quality, so
that I saw him no more, to my very great

-55-

Sometimes they would fix upon my nose, or
forehead, where they stung me to the quick,
smelling very offensively; and I could easily
trace that viscous matter, which, our
naturalists tell us, enables those creatures
to walk with their feet upwards upon a
ceiling. I had much ado to defend myself
against these detestable animals, and
could not forbear starting when they came
on my face. It was the common practice of
the dwarf, to catch a number of these
insects in his hand, as schoolboys do
among us, and let them out suddenly under
my nose, on purpose to frighten me, and
divert the queen. My remedy was to cut
them in pieces with my knife, as they flew in
the air, wherein my dexterity was much
admired.

I remember, one morning, when
Glumdalclitch had set me in a box upon a
window, as she usually did in fair days to
give me air (for I durst not venture to let the
box be hung on a nail out of the window, as
we do with cages in England), after I had
lifted up one of my sashes, and sat down at
my table to eat a piece of sweet cake for my
breakfast, above twenty wasps, allured by
the smell, came flying into the room,
humming louder than the drones of as many
bagpipes. Some of them seized my cake,
and carried it piecemeal away; others flew
about my head and face, confounding me
with the noise, and putting me in the utmost
terror of their stings. However, I had the
courage to rise and draw my hanger, and
attack them in the air. I dispatched four of
them, but the rest got away, and I presently
shut my window. These insects were as
large as partridges: I took out their stings,
found them an inch and a half long, and as
sharp as needles. I carefully preserved them
all; and having since shown them, with
some other curiosities, in several parts of
Europe, upon my return to England I gave
three of them to Gresham College, and kept

-56-

venturing with the smallest of their boats; so
that these people are wholly excluded from
any commerce with the rest of the world. But
the large rivers are full of vessels, and
abound with excellent fish; for they seldom
get any from the sea, because the sea fish
are of the same size with those in Europe,
and consequently not worth catching;
whereby it is manifest, that nature, in the
production of plants and animals of so
extraordinary a bulk, is wholly confined to
this continent, of which I leave the reasons
to be determined by philosophers.
However, now and then they take a whale
that happens to be dashed against the
rocks, which the common people feed on
heartily. These whales I have known so
large, that a man could hardly carry one
upon his shoulders; and sometimes, for
curiosity, they are brought in hampers to
Lorbrulgrud; I saw one of them in a dish at
the king’s table, which passed for a rarity,
but I did not observe he was fond of it; for I
think, indeed, the bigness disgusted him,
although I have seen one somewhat larger
in Greenland.

The country is well inhabited, for it contains
fifty-one cities, near a hundred walled
towns, and a great number of villages. To
satisfy my curious reader, it may be
sufficient to describe Lorbrulgrud. This city
stands upon almost two equal parts, on
each side the river that passes through. It
contains above eighty thousand houses,
and about six hundred thousand inhabitants.
It is in length three glomglungs (which make
about fifty-four English miles,) and two and
a half in breadth; as I measured it myself in
the royal map made by the king’s order,
which was laid on the ground on purpose for
me, and extended a hundred feet: I paced
the diameter and circumference several
times barefoot, and, computing by the
scale, measured it pretty exactly.

-57-

be made for me, of about twelve feet
square, and ten high, for the convenience of
travelling; because the other was
somewhat too large for Glumdalclitch’s lap,
and cumbersome in the coach; it was made
by the same artist, whom I directed in the
whole contrivance. This travelling-closet
was an exact square, with a window in the
middle of three of the squares, and each
window was latticed with iron wire on the
outside, to prevent accidents in long
journeys. On the fourth side, which had no
window, two strong staples were fixed,
through which the person that carried me,
when I had a mind to be on horseback, put a
leathern belt, and buckled it about his waist.
This was always the office of some grave
trusty servant, in whom I could confide,
whether I attended the king and queen in
their progresses, or were disposed to see
the gardens, or pay a visit to some great
lady or minister of state in the court, when
Glumdalclitch happened to be out of order;
for I soon began to be known and esteemed
among the greatest officers, I suppose
more upon account of their majesties’
favour, than any merit of my own. In
journeys, when I was weary of the coach, a
servant on horseback would buckle on my
box, and place it upon a cushion before
him; and there I had a full prospect of the
country on three sides, from my three
windows. I had, in this closet, a field-bed
and a hammock, hung from the ceiling, two
chairs and a table, neatly screwed to the
floor, to prevent being tossed about by the
agitation of the horse or the coach. And
having been long used to sea-voyages,
those motions, although sometimes very
violent, did not much discompose me.

Whenever I had a mind to see the town, it
was always in my travelling-closet; which
Glumdalclitch held in her lap in a kind of
open sedan, after the fashion of the country,
borne by four men, and attended by two

-58-

kitchen grate, the prodigious pots and
kettles, the joints of meat turning on the
spits, with many other particulars, perhaps I
should be hardly believed; at least a severe
critic would be apt to think I enlarged a little,
as travellers are often suspected to do. To
avoid which censure I fear I have run too
much into the other extreme; and that if this
treatise should happen to be translated into
the language of Brobdingnag (which is the
general name of that kingdom,) and
transmitted thither, the king and his people
would have reason to complain that I had
done them an injury, by a false and
diminutive representation.

His majesty seldom keeps above six
hundred horses in his stables: they are
generally from fifty-four to sixty feet high.
But, when he goes abroad on solemn days,
he is attended, for state, by a military guard
of five hundred horse, which, indeed, I
thought was the most splendid sight that
could be ever beheld, till I saw part of his
army in battalia, whereof I shall find another
occasion to speak.

CHAPTER V.

[Several adventurers that happened to the
author. The execution of a criminal. The
author shows his skill in navigation.]

I should have lived happy enough in that
country, if my littleness had not exposed me
to several ridiculous and troublesome
accidents; some of which I shall venture to
relate. Glumdalclitch often carried me into
the gardens of the court in my smaller box,
and would sometimes take me out of it, and
hold me in her hand, or set me down to
walk. I remember, before the dwarf left the
queen, he followed us one day into those
gardens, and my nurse having set me
down, he and I being close together, near
some dwarf apple trees, I must needs show

-59-

and out of hearing, a small white spaniel
that belonged to one of the chief gardeners,
having got by accident into the garden,
happened to range near the place where I
lay: the dog, following the scent, came
directly up, and taking me in his mouth, ran
straight to his master wagging his tail, and
set me gently on the ground. By good
fortune he had been so well taught, that I
was carried between his teeth without the
least hurt, or even tearing my clothes. But
the poor gardener, who knew me well, and
had a great kindness for me, was in a
terrible fright: he gently took me up in both
his hands, and asked me how I did? but I
was so amazed and out of breath, that I
could not speak a word. In a few minutes I
came to myself, and he carried me safe to
my little nurse, who, by this time, had
returned to the place where she left me, and
was in cruel agonies when I did not appear,
nor answer when she called. She severely
reprimanded the gardener on account of his
dog. But the thing was hushed up, and never
known at court, for the girl was afraid of the
queen’s anger; and truly, as to myself, I
thought it would not be for my reputation,
that such a story should go about.

This accident absolutely determined
Glumdalclitch never to trust me abroad for
the future out of her sight. I had been long
afraid of this resolution, and therefore
concealed from her some little unlucky
adventures, that happened in those times
when I was left by myself. Once a kite,
hovering over the garden, made a stoop at
me, and if I had not resolutely drawn my
hanger, and run under a thick espalier, he
would have certainly carried me away in his
talons. Another time, walking to the top of a
fresh mole-hill, I fell to my neck in the hole,
through which that animal had cast up the
earth, and coined some lie, not worth
remembering, to excuse myself for spoiling
my clothes. I likewise broke my right shin

-60-

much disgusted because, to say the truth, a
very offensive smell came from their skins;
which I do not mention, or intend, to the
disadvantage of those excellent ladies, for
whom I have all manner of respect; but I
conceive that my sense was more acute in
proportion to my littleness, and that those
illustrious persons were no more
disagreeable to their lovers, or to each
other, than people of the same quality are
with us in England. And, after all, I found
their natural smell was much more
supportable, than when they used
perfumes, under which I immediately
swooned away. I cannot forget, that an
intimate friend of mine in Lilliput, took the
freedom in a warm day, when I had used a
good deal of exercise, to complain of a
strong smell about me, although I am as little
faulty that way, as most of my sex: but I
suppose his faculty of smelling was as nice
with regard to me, as mine was to that of
this people. Upon this point, I cannot forbear
doing justice to the queen my mistress, and
Glumdalclitch my nurse, whose persons
were as sweet as those of any lady in
England.

That which gave me most uneasiness
among these maids of honour (when my
nurse carried me to visit then) was, to see
them use me without any manner of
ceremony, like a creature who had no sort
of consequence: for they would strip
themselves to the skin, and put on their
smocks in my presence, while I was placed
on their toilet, directly before their naked
bodies, which I am sure to me was very far
from being a tempting sight, or from giving
me any other emotions than those of horror
and disgust: their skins appeared so coarse
and uneven, so variously coloured, when I
saw them near, with a mole here and there
as broad as a trencher, and hairs hanging
from it thicker than packthreads, to say
nothing farther concerning the rest of their

-61-

employment had been to be surgeon or
doctor to the ship, yet often, upon a pinch, I
was forced to work like a common mariner.
But I could not see how this could be done in
their country, where the smallest wherry
was equal to a first-rate man of war among
us; and such a boat as I could manage
would never live in any of their rivers. Her
majesty said, if I would contrive a boat, her
own joiner should make it, and she would
provide a place for me to sail in. The fellow
was an ingenious workman, and by my
instructions, in ten days, finished a
pleasure-boat with all its tackling, able
conveniently to hold eight Europeans. When
it was finished, the queen was so delighted,
that she ran with it in her lap to the king, who
ordered it to be put into a cistern full of
water, with me in it, by way of trial, where I
could not manage my two sculls, or little
oars, for want of room. But the queen had
before contrived another project. She
ordered the joiner to make a wooden
trough of three hundred feet long, fifty
broad, and eight deep; which, being well
pitched, to prevent leaking, was placed on
the floor, along the wall, in an outer room of
the palace. It had a cock near the bottom to
let out the water, when it began to grow
stale; and two servants could easily fill it in
half an hour. Here I often used to row for my
own diversion, as well as that of the queen
and her ladies, who thought themselves well
entertained with my skill and agility.
Sometimes I would put up my sail, and then
my business was only to steer, while the
ladies gave me a gale with their fans; and,
when they were weary, some of their pages
would blow my sail forward with their
breath, while I showed my art by steering
starboard or larboard as I pleased. When I
had done, Glumdalclitch always carried
back my boat into her closet, and hung it on
a nail to dry.

In this exercise I once met an accident,

-62-

quietly meditating at my table, I heard
something bounce in at the closet-window,
and skip about from one side to the other:
whereat, although I was much alarmed, yet I
ventured to look out, but not stirring from my
seat; and then I saw this frolicsome animal
frisking and leaping up and down, till at last
he came to my box, which he seemed to
view with great pleasure and curiosity,
peeping in at the door and every window. I
retreated to the farther corner of my room;
or box; but the monkey looking in at every
side, put me in such a fright, that I wanted
presence of mind to conceal myself under
the bed, as I might easily have done. After
some time spent in peeping, grinning, and
chattering, he at last espied me; and
reaching one of his paws in at the door, as a
cat does when she plays with a mouse,
although I often shifted place to avoid him,
he at length seized the lappet of my coat
(which being made of that country silk, was
very thick and strong), and dragged me out.
He took me up in his right fore-foot and held
me as a nurse does a child she is going to
suckle, just as I have seen the same sort of
creature do with a kitten in Europe; and
when I offered to struggle he squeezed me
so hard, that I thought it more prudent to
submit. I have good reason to believe, that
he took me for a young one of his own
species, by his often stroking my face very
gently with his other paw. In these
diversions he was interrupted by a noise at
the closet door, as if somebody were
opening it: whereupon he suddenly leaped
up to the window at which he had come in,
and thence upon the leads and gutters,
walking upon three legs, and holding me in
the fourth, till he clambered up to a roof that
was next to ours. I heard Glumdalclitch give
a shriek at the moment he was carrying me
out. The poor girl was almost distracted:
that quarter of the palace was all in an
uproar; the servants ran for ladders; the
monkey was seen by hundreds in the court,

-63-

to return him thanks for his favours, he was
pleased to rally me a good deal upon this
adventure. He asked me, “what my thoughts
and speculations were, while I lay in the
monkey’s paw; how I liked the victuals he
gave me; his manner of feeding; and
whether the fresh air on the roof had
sharpened my stomach.” He desired to
know, “what I would have done upon such
an occasion in my own country.” I told his
majesty, “that in Europe we had no
monkeys, except such as were brought for
curiosity from other places, and so small,
that I could deal with a dozen of them
together, if they presumed to attack me.
And as for that monstrous animal with
whom I was so lately engaged (it was
indeed as large as an elephant), if my fears
had suffered me to think so far as to make
use of my hanger,” (looking fiercely, and
clapping my hand on the hilt, as I spoke)
“when he poked his paw into my chamber,
perhaps I should have given him such a
wound, as would have made him glad to
withdraw it with more haste than he put it in.”
This I delivered in a firm tone, like a person
who was jealous lest his courage should be
called in question. However, my speech
produced nothing else beside a laud
laughter, which all the respect due to his
majesty from those about him could not
make them contain. This made me reflect,
how vain an attempt it is for a man to
endeavour to do himself honour among
those who are out of all degree of equality
or comparison with him. And yet I have seen
the moral of my own behaviour very frequent
in England since my return; where a little
contemptible varlet, without the least title to
birth, person, wit, or common sense, shall
presume to look with importance, and put
himself upon a foot with the greatest
persons of the kingdom.

I was every day furnishing the court with
some ridiculous story: and Glumdalclitch,

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could get from Glumdalclitch. I fixed in the
stumps so artificially, scraping and sloping
them with my knife toward the points, that I
made a very tolerable comb; which was a
seasonable supply, my own being so much
broken in the teeth, that it was almost
useless: neither did I know any artist in that
country so nice and exact, as would
undertake to make me another.

And this puts me in mind of an amusement,
wherein I spent many of my leisure hours. I
desired the queen’s woman to save for me
the combings of her majesty’s hair,
whereof in time I got a good quantity; and
consulting with my friend the cabinet-
maker, who had received general orders to
do little jobs for me, I directed him to make
two chair-frames, no larger than those I had
in my box, and to bore little holes with a fine
awl, round those parts where I designed the
backs and seats; through these holes I
wove the strongest hairs I could pick out,
just after the manner of cane chairs in
England. When they were finished, I made a
present of them to her majesty; who kept
them in her cabinet, and used to show them
for curiosities, as indeed they were the
wonder of every one that beheld them. The
queen would have me sit upon one of these
chairs, but I absolutely refused to obey her,
protesting I would rather die than place a
dishonourable part of my body on those
precious hairs, that once adorned her
majesty’s head. Of these hairs (as I had
always a mechanical genius) I likewise
made a neat little purse, about five feet
long, with her majesty’s name deciphered
in gold letters, which I gave to Glumdalclitch,
by the queen’s consent. To say the truth, it
was more for show than use, being not of
strength to bear the weight of the larger
coins, and therefore she kept nothing in it
but some little toys that girls are fond of.

The king, who delighted in music, had

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sixteen keys, nor consequently play the
bass and treble together, as other artists
do; which was a great disadvantage to my
performance.

The king, who, as I before observed, was a
prince of excellent understanding, would
frequently order that I should be brought in
my box, and set upon the table in his closet:
he would then command me to bring one of
my chairs out of the box, and sit down within
three yards distance upon the top of the
cabinet, which brought me almost to a level
with his face. In this manner I had several
conversations with him. I one day took the
freedom to tell his majesty, “that the
contempt he discovered towards Europe,
and the rest of the world, did not seem
answerable to those excellent qualities of
mind that he was master of; that reason did
not extend itself with the bulk of the body; on
the contrary, we observed in our country,
that the tallest persons were usually the
least provided with it; that among other
animals, bees and ants had the reputation
of more industry, art, and sagacity, than
many of the larger kinds; and that, as
inconsiderable as he took me to be, I hoped
I might live to do his majesty some signal
service.” The king heard me with attention,
and began to conceive a much better
opinion of me than he had ever before. He
desired “I would give him as exact an
account of the government of England as I
possibly could; because, as fond as
princes commonly are of their own customs
(for so he conjectured of other monarchs,
by my former discourses), he should be
glad to hear of any thing that might deserve
imitation.”

Imagine with thyself, courteous reader, how
often I then wished for the tongue of
Demosthenes or Cicero, that might have
enabled me to celebrate the praise of my
own dear native country in a style equal to its

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the people themselves, for their great
abilities and love of their country, to
represent the wisdom of the whole nation.
And that these two bodies made up the
most august assembly in Europe; to whom,
in conjunction with the prince, the whole
legislature is committed.

I then descended to the courts of justice;
over which the judges, those venerable
sages and interpreters of the law, presided,
for determining the disputed rights and
properties of men, as well as for the
punishment of vice and protection of
innocence. I mentioned the prudent
management of our treasury; the valour and
achievements of our forces, by sea and
land. I computed the number of our people,
by reckoning how many millions there might
be of each religious sect, or political party
among us. I did not omit even our sports and
pastimes, or any other particular which I
thought might redound to the honour of my
country. And I finished all with a brief
historical account of affairs and events in
England for about a hundred years past.

This conversation was not ended under five
audiences, each of several hours; and the
king heard the whole with great attention,
frequently taking notes of what I spoke, as
well as memorandums of what questions he
intended to ask me.

When I had put an end to these long
discources, his majesty, in a sixth
audience, consulting his notes, proposed
many doubts, queries, and objections,
upon every article. He asked, “What
methods were used to cultivate the minds
and bodies of our young nobility, and in
what kind of business they commonly spent
the first and teachable parts of their lives?
What course was taken to supply that
assembly, when any noble family became
extinct? What qualifications were necessary

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sifted me thoroughly upon every part of this
head, proposing numberless inquiries and
objections, which I think it not prudent or
convenient to repeat.

Upon what I said in relation to our courts of
justice, his majesty desired to be satisfied
in several points: and this I was the better
able to do, having been formerly almost
ruined by a long suit in chancery, which was
decreed for me with costs. He asked, “What
time was usually spent in determining
between right and wrong, and what degree
of expense? Whether advocates and
orators had liberty to plead in causes
manifestly known to be unjust, vexatious, or
oppressive? Whether party, in religion or
politics, were observed to be of any weight
in the scale of justice? Whether those
pleading orators were persons educated in
the general knowledge of equity, or only in
provincial, national, and other local
customs? Whether they or their judges had
any part in penning those laws, which they
assumed the liberty of interpreting, and
glossing upon at their pleasure? Whether
they had ever, at different times, pleaded
for and against the same cause, and cited
precedents to prove contrary opinions?
Whether they were a rich or a poor
corporation? Whether they received any
pecuniary reward for pleading, or delivering
their opinions? And particularly, whether
they were ever admitted as members in the
lower senate?”

He fell next upon the management of our
treasury; and said, “he thought my memory
had failed me, because I computed our
taxes at about five or six millions a-year,
and when I came to mention the issues, he
found they sometimes amounted to more
than double; for the notes he had taken
were very particular in this point, because
he hoped, as he told me, that the
knowledge of our conduct might be useful to

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our nobility and gentry, I had mentioned
gaming: he desired to know at what age this
entertainment was usually taken up, and
when it was laid down; how much of their
time it employed; whether it ever went so
high as to affect their fortunes; whether
mean, vicious people, by their dexterity in
that art, might not arrive at great riches, and
sometimes keep our very nobles in
dependence, as well as habituate them to
vile companions, wholly take them from the
improvement of their minds, and force
them, by the losses they received, to learn
and practise that infamous dexterity upon
others?”

He was perfectly astonished with the
historical account gave him of our affairs
during the last century; protesting “it was
only a heap of conspiracies, rebellions,
murders, massacres, revolutions,
banishments, the very worst effects that
avarice, faction, hypocrisy, perfidiousness,
cruelty, rage, madness, hatred, envy, lust,
malice, and ambition, could produce.”

His majesty, in another audience, was at
the pains to recapitulate the sum of all I had
spoken; compared the questions he made
with the answers I had given; then taking me
into his hands, and stroking me gently,
delivered himself in these words, which I
shall never forget, nor the manner he spoke
them in: “My little friend Grildrig, you have
made a most admirable panegyric upon
your country; you have clearly proved, that
ignorance, idleness, and vice, are the
proper ingredients for qualifying a
legislator; that laws are best explained,
interpreted, and applied, by those whose
interest and abilities lie in perverting,
confounding, and eluding them. I observe
among you some lines of an institution,
which, in its original, might have been
tolerable, but these half erased, and the rest
wholly blurred and blotted by corruptions. It

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much I may be allowed to say in my own
vindication, that I artfully eluded many of his
questions, and gave to every point a more
favourable turn, by many degrees, than the
strictness of truth would allow. For I have
always borne that laudable partiality to my
own country, which Dionysius
Halicarnassensis, with so much justice,
recommends to an historian: I would hide
the frailties and deformities of my political
mother, and place her virtues and beauties
in the most advantageous light. This was my
sincere endeavour in those many
discourses I had with that monarch,
although it unfortunately failed of success.

But great allowances should be given to a
king, who lives wholly secluded from the
rest of the world, and must therefore be
altogether unacquainted with the manners
and customs that most prevail in other
nations: the want of which knowledge will
ever produce many prejudices, and a
certain narrowness of thinking, from which
we, and the politer countries of Europe, are
wholly exempted. And it would be hard
indeed, if so remote a prince’s notions of
virtue and vice were to be offered as a
standard for all mankind.

To confirm what I have now said, and further
to show the miserable effects of a confined
education, I shall here insert a passage,
which will hardly obtain belief. In hopes to
ingratiate myself further into his majesty’s
favour, I told him of “an invention,
discovered between three and four hundred
years ago, to make a certain powder, into a
heap of which, the smallest spark of fire
falling, would kindle the whole in a moment,
although it were as big as a mountain, and
make it all fly up in the air together, with a
noise and agitation greater than thunder.
That a proper quantity of this powder
rammed into a hollow tube of brass or iron,
according to its bigness, would drive a ball

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machines; whereof,” he said, “some evil
genius, enemy to mankind, must have been
the first contriver. As for himself, he
protested, that although few things
delighted him so much as new discoveries
in art or in nature, yet he would rather lose
half his kingdom, than be privy to such a
secret; which he commanded me, as I
valued any life, never to mention any more.”

A strange effect of narrow principles and
views! that a prince possessed of every
quality which procures veneration, love, and
esteem; of strong parts, great wisdom, and
profound learning, endowed with admirable
talents, and almost adored by his subjects,
should, from a nice, unnecessary scruple,
whereof in Europe we can have no
conception, let slip an opportunity put into
his hands that would have made him
absolute master of the lives, the liberties,
and the fortunes of his people! Neither do I
say this, with the least intention to detract
from the many virtues of that excellent king,
whose character, I am sensible, will, on this
account, be very much lessened in the
opinion of an English reader: but I take this
defect among them to have risen from their
ignorance, by not having hitherto reduced
politics into a science, as the more acute
wits of Europe have done. For, I remember
very well, in a discourse one day with the
king, when I happened to say, “there were
several thousand books among us written
upon the art of government,” it gave him
(directly contrary to my intention) a very
mean opinion of our understandings. He
professed both to abominate and despise
all mystery, refinement, and intrigue, either
in a prince or a minister. He could not tell
what I meant by secrets of state, where an
enemy, or some rival nation, were not in the
case. He confined the knowledge of
governing within very narrow bounds, to
common sense and reason, to justice and
lenity, to the speedy determination of civil

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feet high, formed like a standing ladder; the
steps were each fifty feet long. It was
indeed a moveable pair of stairs, the lowest
end placed at ten feet distance from the wall
of the chamber. The book I had a mind to
read, was put up leaning against the wall: I
first mounted to the upper step of the
ladder, and turning my face towards the
book, began at the top of the page, and so
walking to the right and left about eight or
ten paces, according to the length of the
lines, till I had gotten a little below the level of
mine eyes, and then descending gradually
till I came to the bottom: after which I
mounted again, and began the other page
in the same manner, and so turned over the
leaf, which I could easily do with both my
hands, for it was as thick and stiff as a
pasteboard, and in the largest folios not
above eighteen or twenty feet long.

Their style is clear, masculine, and smooth,
but not florid; for they avoid nothing more
than multiplying unnecessary words, or
using various expressions. I have perused
many of their books, especially those in
history and morality. Among the rest, I was
much diverted with a little old treatise, which
always lay in Glumdalclitch’s bed chamber,
and belonged to her governess, a grave
elderly gentlewoman, who dealt in writings
of morality and devotion. The book treats of
the weakness of human kind, and is in little
esteem, except among the women and the
vulgar. However, I was curious to see what
an author of that country could say upon
such a subject. This writer went through all
the usual topics of European moralists,
showing “how diminutive, contemptible,
and helpless an animal was man in his own
nature; how unable to defend himself from
inclemencies of the air, or the fury of wild
beasts: how much he was excelled by one
creature in strength, by another in speed, by
a third in foresight, by a fourth in industry.”
He added, “that nature was degenerated in

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Venice, by ballot?

I have often seen the militia of Lorbrulgrud
drawn out to exercise, in a great field near
the city of twenty miles square. They were in
all not above twenty-five thousand foot, and
six thousand horse; but it was impossible
for me to compute their number,
considering the space of ground they took
up. A cavalier, mounted on a large steed,
might be about ninety feet high. I have seen
this whole body of horse, upon a word of
command, draw their swords at once, and
brandish them in the air. Imagination can
figure nothing so grand, so surprising, and
so astonishing! it looked as if ten thousand
flashes of lightning were darting at the
same time from every quarter of the sky.

I was curious to know how this prince, to
whose dominions there is no access from
any other country, came to think of armies,
or to teach his people the practice of military
discipline. But I was soon informed, both by
conversation and reading their histories;
for, in the course of many ages, they have
been troubled with the same disease to
which the whole race of mankind is subject;
the nobility often contending for power, the
people for liberty, and the king for absolute
dominion. All which, however happily
tempered by the laws of that kingdom, have
been sometimes violated by each of the
three parties, and have more than once
occasioned civil wars; the last whereof was
happily put an end to by this prince’s grand-
father, in a general composition; and the
militia, then settled with common consent,
has been ever since kept in the strictest
duty.

CHAPTER VIII.

[The king and queen make a progress to the
frontiers. The author attends them. The
manner in which he leaves the country very

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when a servant carried me before him on
horseback, as I sometimes desired; and
would often sleep in my hammock, while we
were upon the road. On the roof of my
closet, not directly over the middle of the
hammock, I ordered the joiner to cut out a
hole of a foot square, to give me air in hot
weather, as I slept; which hole I shut at
pleasure with a board that drew backward
and forward through a groove.

When we came to our journey’s end, the
king thought proper to pass a few days at a
palace he has near Flanflasnic, a city within
eighteen English miles of the seaside.
Glumdalclitch and I were much fatigued: I
had gotten a small cold, but the poor girl
was so ill as to be confined to her chamber. I
longed to see the ocean, which must be the
only scene of my escape, if ever it should
happen. I pretended to be worse than I really
was, and desired leave to take the fresh air
of the sea, with a page, whom I was very
fond of, and who had sometimes been
trusted with me. I shall never forget with
what unwillingness Glumdalclitch
consented, nor the strict charge she gave
the page to be careful of me, bursting at the
same time into a flood of tears, as if she
had some forboding of what was to
happen. The boy took me out in my box,
about half an hours walk from the palace,
towards the rocks on the sea-shore. I
ordered him to set me down, and lifting up
one of my sashes, cast many a wistful
melancholy look towards the sea. I found
myself not very well, and told the page that I
had a mind to take a nap in my hammock,
which I hoped would do me good. I got in,
and the boy shut the window close down, to
keep out the cold. I soon fell asleep, and all I
can conjecture is, while I slept, the page,
thinking no danger could happen, went
among the rocks to look for birds’ eggs,
having before observed him from my
window searching about, and picking up

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now suppose, that the eagle which flew
away with my box was pursued by two or
three others, and forced to let me drop,
while he defended himself against the rest,
who hoped to share in the prey. The plates
of iron fastened at the bottom of the box (for
those were the strongest) preserved the
balance while it fell, and hindered it from
being broken on the surface of the water.
Every joint of it was well grooved; and the
door did not move on hinges, but up and
down like a sash, which kept my closet so
tight that very little water came in. I got with
much difficulty out of my hammock, having
first ventured to draw back the slip-board
on the roof already mentioned, contrived on
purpose to let in air, for want of which I
found myself almost stifled.

How often did I then wish myself with my
dear Glumdalclitch, from whom one single
hour had so far divided me! And I may say
with truth, that in the midst of my own
misfortunes I could not forbear lamenting
my poor nurse, the grief she would suffer for
my loss, the displeasure of the queen, and
the ruin of her fortune. Perhaps many
travellers have not been under greater
difficulties and distress than I was at this
juncture, expecting every moment to see
my box dashed to pieces, or at least overset
by the first violent blast, or rising wave. A
breach in one single pane of glass would
have been immediate death: nor could any
thing have preserved the windows, but the
strong lattice wires placed on the outside,
against accidents in travelling. I saw the
water ooze in at several crannies, although
the leaks were not considerable, and I
endeavoured to stop them as well as I could.
I was not able to lift up the roof of my closet,
which otherwise I certainly should have
done, and sat on the top of it; where I might
at least preserve myself some hours longer,
than by being shut up (as I may call it) in the
hold. Or if I escaped these dangers for a

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cover of my closet, like that of a cable, and
the grating of it as it passed through the ring.
I then found myself hoisted up, by degrees,
at least three feet higher than I was before.
Whereupon I again thrust up my stick and
handkerchief, calling for help till I was
almost hoarse. In return to which, I heard a
great shout repeated three times, giving me
such transports of joy as are not to be
conceived but by those who feel them. I now
heard a trampling over my head, and
somebody calling through the hole with a
loud voice, in the English tongue, “If there be
any body below, let them speak.” I
answered, “I was an Englishman, drawn by
ill fortune into the greatest calamity that ever
any creature underwent, and begged, by all
that was moving, to be delivered out of the
dungeon I was in.” The voice replied, “I was
safe, for my box was fastened to their ship;
and the carpenter should immediately come
and saw a hole in the cover, large enough to
pull me out.” I answered, “that was
needless, and would take up too much time;
for there was no more to be done, but let
one of the crew put his finger into the ring,
and take the box out of the sea into the ship,
and so into the captain’s cabin.” Some of
them, upon hearing me talk so wildly,
thought I was mad: others laughed; for
indeed it never came into my head, that I
was now got among people of my own
stature and strength. The carpenter came,
and in a few minutes sawed a passage
about four feet square, then let down a
small ladder, upon which I mounted, and
thence was taken into the ship in a very
weak condition.

The sailors were all in amazement, and
asked me a thousand questions, which I
had no inclination to answer. I was equally
confounded at the sight of so many
pigmies, for such I took them to be, after
having so long accustomed mine eyes to
the monstrous objects I had left. But the

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entertained me with great kindness,
observing me not to look wildly, or talk
inconsistently: and, when we were left
alone, desired I would give him a relation of
my travels, and by what accident I came to
be set adrift, in that monstrous wooden
chest. He said “that about twelve o’clock at
noon, as he was looking through his glass,
he spied it at a distance, and thought it was
a sail, which he had a mind to make, being
not much out of his course, in hopes of
buying some biscuit, his own beginning to
fall short. That upon coming nearer, and
finding his error, he sent out his long-boat to
discover what it was; that his men came
back in a fright, swearing they had seen a
swimming house. That he laughed at their
folly, and went himself in the boat, ordering
his men to take a strong cable along with
them. That the weather being calm, he
rowed round me several times, observed
my windows and wire lattices that defended
them. That he discovered two staples upon
one side, which was all of boards, without
any passage for light. He then commanded
his men to row up to that side, and fastening
a cable to one of the staples, ordered them
to tow my chest, as they called it, toward the
ship. When it was there, he gave directions
to fasten another cable to the ring fixed in
the cover, and to raise up my chest with
pulleys, which all the sailors were not able to
do above two or three feet.” He said, “they
saw my stick and handkerchief thrust out of
the hole, and concluded that some unhappy
man must be shut up in the cavity.” I asked,
“whether he or the crew had seen any
prodigious birds in the air, about the time he
first discovered me.” To which he
answered, that discoursing this matter with
the sailors while I was asleep, one of them
said, he had observed three eagles flying
towards the north, but remarked nothing of
their being larger than the usual size:” which
I suppose must be imputed to the great
height they were at; and he could not guess